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Array
(
[sid] => 186948
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Nothing Could Be Finer Than to Tell Them a One-Liner
[time] => 2020-04-24 21:39:48
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => “Do you have a bathroom?” is my favorite question yet.
I tell them it’s the little room with a toilet inside it.
When they drag their photos out of darling grandkids that
have one tooth and drool all day, I tend to brag right back,
by pointing out that I once had a boyfriend just like that.
When a policeman pulls me over I assure the man
that the affluence of inkohol is under my command,
and I am not as drunk as some thinkle peep I am.
The best gift you can give a bald man is a comb.
He will never part with it, history has shown.
I once heard two hats talking, and the first one said,
“You wait right here for me and I’ll go on a head”.
Pirates give away their age, especially when they’re 80.
Havent we all heard them say quite honestly “Aye Matey”?
Athletes get athlete’s foot, but most of us don’t know
That astronauts are similarly cursed with missle-toe.
How do poets say hello? This you ought to know.
They say “Haven’t we metaphor?”
Now it’s time I go.
[comments] => 2
[counter] => 50
[topic] => 7
[informant] => softerware
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 0
[ratings] => 0
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => HumorPoetry
)
Nothing Could Be Finer Than to Tell Them a One-Liner
Contributed by
softerware
on
Friday, 24th April 2020 @ 09:39:48 PM in AEST
Topic:
HumorPoetry
|
“Do you have a bathroom?” is my favorite question yet.
I tell them it’s the little room with a toilet inside it.
When they drag their photos out of darling grandkids that
have one tooth and drool all day, I tend to brag right back,
by pointing out that I once had a boyfriend just like that.
When a policeman pulls me over I assure the man
that the affluence of inkohol is under my command,
and I am not as drunk as some thinkle peep I am.
The best gift you can give a bald man is a comb.
He will never part with it, history has shown.
I once heard two hats talking, and the first one said,
“You wait right here for me and I’ll go on a head”.
Pirates give away their age, especially when they’re 80.
Havent we all heard them say quite honestly “Aye Matey”?
Athletes get athlete’s foot, but most of us don’t know
That astronauts are similarly cursed with missle-toe.
How do poets say hello? This you ought to know.
They say “Haven’t we metaphor?”
Now it’s time I go.
Copyright ©
softerware
... [
2020-04-24 21:39:48] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Nothing Could Be Finer Than to Tell Them a One-Liner
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Saturday, 25th April 2020 @ 02:16:32 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
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very funny, and well done regarding saying exactly what is on ones mind. I think it opens the air and creates a most positive dialogue no matter who you are or where ever one goes.
regarding the comb, I stopped using those a while ago.
I cannot play the comb, not even as a musical instrument.
when if ever I become 80 I will be a pirate, a true buccaneer who always starts out each conversation with this one important question, Yar talking to me? Followed by, Well you have come to the right place if Yar be!
you poems are funny and they make me laugh!
Peace!
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Re: Nothing Could Be Finer Than to Tell Them a One-Liner
(User Rating: 1 ) by JamesStockdale on
Sunday, 26th April 2020 @ 01:46:38 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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Wonderful!!! |
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