|
Menu
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
Array
(
[sid] => 186218
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Off the Cuff
[time] => 2019-05-14 06:46:08
[hometext] => Proving once again that we can find a use for anything!
[bodytext] => Facts below are offered so that you may lie in wait; Or interrupt, perchance rebut those who pontificate.
To your success here lies the best of truthful obscure stuff...That you may drop, or put a stop, to heaven knows not what!
The cornea has no blood supply. It gets O2 from air. And cornflakes have more genes than we do..that just isn’t fair!
To demonstrate its worth the wait to find our life’s true courses; Danny DeVito used to be a hairdresser to corpses.
The moon and sun look equal sized, but we think you should know sir; The moons 400 times as small, and 400 times closer!
Of all the humans that have reached the age of 65, half of them since time began are currently alive.
As any parent knows who has a 4 year old today, Its proven that they ask 400 questions every day.
Ancestry research companies are careful not to say; That humans and bananas share half their DNA.
Bubblewrap was not designed to keep our objects safer; It began as someone’s plan to be 3-D wallpaper.
I itch and twitch when tasted by mosquitos that I meet; Cause I have just been bitten by their 47 teeth.
We shed 600,000 flakes per hour, thats how, they say, you and I replace our outer skin in 30 days.
You can’t hum when your nose pinched, and while you read this rhyme; You’ll find that you cannot swallow and breathe at the same time.
All humans radiate a light, the naked eye can’t see. And were taller in the mornings, because of gravity.
Our heartbeat syncs to music when we listen to the beat; Perhaps that’s why a quarter of our bones are in our feet!
Movie popcorn’s more per ounce than aged filet mignon. Explaining why our jaws contain the strongest muscles found.
Were likelier to be president than win the lottery. And by the numbers what encumbers man has come to be;
Not world wide hunger as before, but mass obesity.
We are a contradiction, which lastly is proved thus; There are more cars than people living in Los Angeles.
And just to show we trust (although we put the test to some): you pinched your nose and held it closed to see if you could hum.
[comments] => 5
[counter] => 78
[topic] => 60
[informant] => softerware
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 0
[ratings] => 0
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => insomniac
)
Off the Cuff
Contributed by
softerware
on
Tuesday, 14th May 2019 @ 06:46:08 AM in AEST
Topic:
insomniac
|
Facts below are offered so that you may lie in wait; Or interrupt, perchance rebut those who pontificate.
To your success here lies the best of truthful obscure stuff...That you may drop, or put a stop, to heaven knows not what!
The cornea has no blood supply. It gets O2 from air. And cornflakes have more genes than we do..that just isn’t fair!
To demonstrate its worth the wait to find our life’s true courses; Danny DeVito used to be a hairdresser to corpses.
The moon and sun look equal sized, but we think you should know sir; The moons 400 times as small, and 400 times closer!
Of all the humans that have reached the age of 65, half of them since time began are currently alive.
As any parent knows who has a 4 year old today, Its proven that they ask 400 questions every day.
Ancestry research companies are careful not to say; That humans and bananas share half their DNA.
Bubblewrap was not designed to keep our objects safer; It began as someone’s plan to be 3-D wallpaper.
I itch and twitch when tasted by mosquitos that I meet; Cause I have just been bitten by their 47 teeth.
We shed 600,000 flakes per hour, thats how, they say, you and I replace our outer skin in 30 days.
You can’t hum when your nose pinched, and while you read this rhyme; You’ll find that you cannot swallow and breathe at the same time.
All humans radiate a light, the naked eye can’t see. And were taller in the mornings, because of gravity.
Our heartbeat syncs to music when we listen to the beat; Perhaps that’s why a quarter of our bones are in our feet!
Movie popcorn’s more per ounce than aged filet mignon. Explaining why our jaws contain the strongest muscles found.
Were likelier to be president than win the lottery. And by the numbers what encumbers man has come to be;
Not world wide hunger as before, but mass obesity.
We are a contradiction, which lastly is proved thus; There are more cars than people living in Los Angeles.
And just to show we trust (although we put the test to some): you pinched your nose and held it closed to see if you could hum.
Copyright ©
softerware
... [
2019-05-14 06:46:08] (Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment. That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Off the Cuff
(User Rating: 1 ) by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 14th May 2019 @ 07:26:55 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
It was difficult, but I did manage a hum while holding my nose.
Thank you for always educating and entertaining us!!!
|
|
|
Re: Off the Cuff
(User Rating: 1 ) by JamesStockdale on
Tuesday, 14th May 2019 @ 03:17:35 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This was great as usual. Your specialty.
I can easily hum with my nose pinched but I hate those that hum...lol
Loved it! |
|
|
Re: Off the Cuff
(User Rating: 1 ) by ingeniusidiot on
Wednesday, 15th May 2019 @ 02:16:23 AM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
You got me..Im guilty of pinching my nose and trying
to hum...not as easy as one might think. Once again
you have done it, become the history teacher of sorts.
Well actually scientist and historian. The way you
your last line pulled something from earlier in the
piece to become the conclusion and tie it all together
was brilliant. This is one of your many niches,
something that Im sure that I would have trouble
compiling.
Rich |
|
|
Re: Off the Cuff
(User Rating: 1 ) by unknown_utopia on
Wednesday, 15th May 2019 @ 12:40:44 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
knowledge 101
taught by the master
and yes
we are a contradiction..... |
|
|
Re: Off the Cuff
(User Rating: 1 ) by Invierno on
Wednesday, 15th May 2019 @ 08:03:35 PM AEST (User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I LOVE your factoid poems! You either read a great deal or do a lot of research, that is for sure.
Brilliant and informative.
Thanks for sharing!
Invierno |
|
|
|