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Array ( [sid] => 96206 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Essentially Nine [time] => 2005-05-29 21:00:19 [hometext] => [bodytext] => Bar scene.
Libido goes by unseen,
unchecked, as it were.
Smoke like a fog,
smell like a bog,
beer turns it better.
Highlight attraction,
girl in the corner,
doesn't seem lively,
but is ready for action.
Pretty in the gritty light,
obscene in this bar
like a fallen star
in the midafternoon.
Between her lips
and finger tips,
sits a lollipop stick
getting casual licks.
There's no talk of a good time,
no guys waiting in line,
even though she's mighty fine.
They all turn away,
because she's essentially nine.
And way too young for you. [comments] => 5 [counter] => 466 [topic] => 7 [informant] => CodyJ [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 6 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )

Essentially Nine

Contributed by CodyJ on Sunday, 29th May 2005 @ 09:00:19 PM in AEST
Topic: HumorPoetry

Bar scene.
Libido goes by unseen,
unchecked, as it were.
Smoke like a fog,
smell like a bog,
beer turns it better.
Highlight attraction,
girl in the corner,
doesn't seem lively,
but is ready for action.
Pretty in the gritty light,
obscene in this bar
like a fallen star
in the midafternoon.
Between her lips
and finger tips,
sits a lollipop stick
getting casual licks.
There's no talk of a good time,
no guys waiting in line,
even though she's mighty fine.
They all turn away,
because she's essentially nine.
And way too young for you.

Copyright © CodyJ ... [ 2005-05-29 21:00:19]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Essentially Nine (User Rating: 1 )
by jyssvw22 on Sunday, 29th May 2005 @ 09:15:09 PM AEST
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ummm ewwwwww

unless im reading this wrong..?

Re: Essentially Nine (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Sunday, 29th May 2005 @ 09:53:22 PM AEST
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Oh lucky Jen getting her very own poem! lol I have to say, I like your other writes better. This one is a little, ummm creepy...(???!) Hopefully she'll see this in the so-called humourous light it was meant to be....
Scorp.

Re: Essentially Nine (User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on Sunday, 29th May 2005 @ 11:48:30 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Good write.
luv it.
huggs,
emy

Re: Essentially Nine (User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on Monday, 30th May 2005 @ 09:49:51 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

i dont know what quite to think of this one concept wise. i would like to know what the humor was though, because i have my ideas. i agree with scorp though. i remember your work clearly, and with what i remember, this isnt half as well written as those. forced rhymes ,and at some spots it was awkward with sentence formations.

Re: Essentially Nine (User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on Monday, 30th May 2005 @ 10:35:22 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Can you get any more gross or talentless? This is not even humorous. It is just weird and sick.

Puke,
Rita

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