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| Welcome ! | Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link | 11-June 02:22:21 AEST | ||
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Array
(
[sid] => 89953
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Falling Dream
[time] => 2005-04-05 02:37:15
[hometext] => I FALL WAY TOO MUCH!!!
[bodytext] => I climbed the stairs All 200 of them 20 each flight of stairs All 10 stories of them First floor is the check in desk and the lobby Second floor is the first set of rooms Third through the ninth floor are more rooms And the tenth floor is actually the roof The roof in which I am standing on I am standing on the edge Looking down Wondering if it is really worth living Or if this is a dream where I will almost hit the bottom And then will fly up into the clouds Well I guess I will find out Because I have just jumped I’m looking down at the city cars below It looks like rush hour in New York City I wonder if I am going to hit the ground Or if I am going to hit a car Suddenly I am thinking of all the people And all the great things that I am leaving behind I am feeling horrible Not wanting to die anymore But it’s too late I only have 4 flights left to fall And I am wishing I didn’t jump I’m screaming Hoping for help For something Or someone To catch me as I fall But no one hears me But they see me And it’s everyone I am leaving behind Which makes me feel just that much worse But suddenly I am flying Flying into the clouds like a dream This has to be a dream This can’t be real Unless I am dead and this is really heaven But it’s not Because I didn’t see the end of my life But does everyone see the end of their life? Do they know how they died before they die Or is it just something that happens And it’s something we can stop But this time I can stop it Do you know why? Because I am dreaming But it’s not a good dream It’s a bad one But it’s hard to get out of it this time Usually I wake up by the time I have three stories left to fall But this time I’m still falling What’s going on? I’ve had these falling dreams forever But this time I have gotten to 2 stories left I’m almost at the bottom Am I actually going to hit bottom? All the horror stories I have heard is if you dream a falling dream And you hit bottom Then you die instantly With no reason for your loved ones I want a reason I don’t want them to just see me dead suddenly I want them to know why Why can’t anybody hear me screaming I thought I was dreaming But maybe I’m not Maybe I was in my fantasy on the way down and I never really flew Only one floor left I don’t want to die Somebody please help me This time I made the wrong choice I know we aren’t always suppose to get second chances But I really need it this time I won’t ask for another chance if this happens again But just help me Just this once Won’t someone listen I am only a foot from the ground I am practically dead But suddenly I wake up from this horrid dream Thank god it was a dream Because I couldn’t ever live with having my loved ones watching me die like that So I won’t fall anymore But there’s something that I don’t understand I’ve been falling for many years now And it’s suppose to say we are suicidal and depressed But I just don’t understand Because I don’t remember when it started I always have had these falling dreams And I don’t know how to stop them But I want them to Has my life really been that bad? I never thought it was Maybe I was suicidal before I even knew what that really meant I’m not sure My life was never really all that great Maybe I should’ve hit the bottom a long time ago But I didn’t So there must be some reason for me to still be here today I can’t possibly think of why But there must be something So I am now living to figure out why Why I am here today Instead of hitting the bottom from the first time I ever fell Because one of these days I won’t be so lucky As I was this time And all the times prior to this I remember every detail right before I fall Every time too It helps me think of why I am actually doing this And it helps me cry for help Every time I fall But what will happen if I don’t cry out Will I finally hit the bottom I would think so Because I am not really that important to anyone to help me Not without me asking It doesn’t happen when I am awake So why would it happen when I am asleep Maybe it’s that someone actually loves me out there Maybe But I doubt it I can’t think of any true thing that I have done right Every things been wrong Never right Maybe that’s why I like the left path Maybe the left path leads to me falling every time So what will happen if I take the right path Does that mean I won’t fall Or does that mean that I will fall And succeed at what I was trying to do Trying to do every time I fell And let death overcome me So far I think I have taken the left path Maybe just once I’ll try harder and try something right And take the right path And hope luck will be on my side Like it’s been year after year Does anybody know what I mean? Mean when I fall? Help!!! I’m falling!!! [comments] => 2 [counter] => 155 [topic] => 36 [informant] => BabyTears89 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )
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