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Array ( [sid] => 89032 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Pills and Pollution [time] => 2005-03-28 08:01:54 [hometext] => came up wit it last night, hope u like it [bodytext] => I sort all the rain, stick sap in my vein
A mother is cold to the touch
Piece by piece i release
Recipes for disease
Another who can't feel too much

Are u with me as one? Do you dare face the fun?
Then gather like moths to a flame
Recreate my fake hate, as i complicate
Melting a day in the rain

Now time to soothe...

I'm not gravy, i'm just what you made me
The product of pills and pollution
Why try to save me, when i sing so gravely
My silence is someone's solution

Hand me gun, for some thunderous fun
Then clap to what's dead in a see
Up up in the sun, love burns everyone
These wings melt better than with me [comments] => 4 [counter] => 179 [topic] => 13 [informant] => In_a_While [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 12 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
Pills and Pollution

Contributed by In_a_While on Monday, 28th March 2005 @ 08:01:54 AM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry



I sort all the rain, stick sap in my vein
A mother is cold to the touch
Piece by piece i release
Recipes for disease
Another who can't feel too much

Are u with me as one? Do you dare face the fun?
Then gather like moths to a flame
Recreate my fake hate, as i complicate
Melting a day in the rain

Now time to soothe...

I'm not gravy, i'm just what you made me
The product of pills and pollution
Why try to save me, when i sing so gravely
My silence is someone's solution

Hand me gun, for some thunderous fun
Then clap to what's dead in a see
Up up in the sun, love burns everyone
These wings melt better than with me




Copyright © In_a_While ... [ 2005-03-28 08:01:54]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Pills and Pollution (User Rating: 1 )
by Rxqueen on Monday, 28th March 2005 @ 08:49:53 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
I do like.

"love burns everyone"

true.

Nice write.


Re: Pills and Pollution (User Rating: 1 )
by Jackee_line on Monday, 28th March 2005 @ 09:11:31 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Well done


Re: Pills and Pollution (User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on Monday, 28th March 2005 @ 10:03:03 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
"I sort all the rain, stick sap in my vein
A mother is cold to the touch
Piece by piece i release
Recipes for disease
Another who can't feel too much"

I like that.

The only other thing I can say is that your poem yould probably be better if you write 'You' not 'U'

Phil


Re: Pills and Pollution (User Rating: 1 )
by Kay-Kay on Monday, 28th March 2005 @ 03:07:49 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
great poem i like the way you compare things to your poetry nice work keep it up
~Kay-Kay




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