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Decide
Contributed by
fielding88
on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 02:29:55 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
Its been so long since I saw the glow
In the eyes of that young lady.
How many times must I count the ways
Youve moved me baby?
Im sick and tired of you on my mind.
I want my space
I want you out of mine.
Youve got me thinking of life without you
But I know Im living in a world for two.
So crazy, I dont want to know
How youve hypnotized me so.
This world is just too much for me
But I know with you is where Ive got to be.
Take a step back
Give me some room.
Do not come back
Its much too soon.
I have to know
Where you want to be.
Just tell me now
Is it with me?
Im sick and tired of thinking of you
In the arms of another man.
Was I a game? Was it just a ruse
The way you held onto my hand?
Im just so tired of living this way
I want this world to end
Im counting down the days.
I know its easy to say that you love
When youre blinded by the twilight of the stars above.
Youre out there I can feel you near.
You keep your distance but you dont fear.
Someone inside I want to know.
Let your guard down let her show.
I took my time
I took a while.
I gave an inch
You stole a mile.
Im in the dark
Youre in the room.
Youve left your mark
Youve sealed my doom.
Copyright ©
fielding88
... [
2005-01-23 14:29:55]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by dark_descent on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 02:44:40 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| really impressive writing. well structured and thought out. I can really relate to it to. I love that last stanza, its a very powerful way to end the poem |
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 03:20:16 PM AEST
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a Message)
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| great poem . somethins lots of people can relate to. |
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 03:21:07 PM AEST
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| great poem . something lots of people can relate to. |
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by sick_n_twisted on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 04:47:14 PM AEST
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| i was reading your autors note thinger and im going through the exact same thing also and i loved your poem great write! |
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by juliette on
Sunday, 23rd January 2005 @ 05:31:11 PM AEST
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Again - massively impressed.......I have commented on two of your poems in one sitting - this may be a record......I really like your style and you have lots to say so write on!!!!!!
Thanks for sharing!
juliette |
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by savedbydeath on
Monday, 21st February 2005 @ 08:11:59 PM AEST
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awesom write,kinda similar to how i felt about ppl before,thats y i kinda quit getten close to ppl,good write keep it up,loven it
R*J |
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by Essentially9 on
Tuesday, 10th May 2005 @ 08:12:05 PM AEST
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| you know what marc, you need to quit writing about me and not telling me ::hmph:: i cant believe you wrote this about me, im not that horrible. god. how could you do this to me. its ridiculus. just kidding.... great poem marc, i loved the ending stanza because it was so perfect for this piece. the only thing that bothered me in this piece was the use of baby, i hate that word, lol. write some more poems, ::bulldozes through block:: |
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Re: Decide
(User Rating: 1 )
by xXcrossedXx on
Tuesday, 21st June 2005 @ 02:36:56 PM AEST
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This wasn't exactly my "favorite" piece but I liked it much better after the third stanza. Both the fourth and last stanzas were phenominal the feeling you put in to them was shot right back out, I enjoyed every line within them. Besides those two the second to last stanza just knocked me off my feet, it's incrediable and left me speechless. With those three phenominal stanzas it makes this piece one of my favorites, even though I said it wasn't. lol.
All in all, this was a fantastic write. Again, one to be very proud of. You just blow me away everytime I read another poem. Your concepts are very unique and extremely thought out with so much emotion and feeling put in to them.. keep writing.
--amanda-- |
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