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Array ( [sid] => 72474 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => From me to you [time] => 2004-11-20 20:56:24 [hometext] => yeah wuz bored, u no the story, but heh its a kool poem that sprang up from bordom eh? enjoy and plz comment! [bodytext] => Walking down the road again, the somber silence abrupt,
I sense it every now and then, the feelings start to errupt,
The coldness of the bitter wind, my hair hiding the sadness,
Time passing that will never end, one inch away from madness,
Music blaring deep into my head, the only thing keeping me sane,
If I didn't have music I'd be dead, the echoes of song in my brain,
The subliminal lyrics of masquerade, the lies and all the truth,
As light dissapears into the shade, the passing years of youth,
The days and weeks pass by me, as if they were only mere moments,
Everything rushing by so blindly, in quick and rapid paced movements,
Then sooner of later my time will end, and life will have passed me by right then,
My love and words I'll want to send, but I will not have accomplished them my friend,
So this is why I am writing this poem, to be known by atleast a dear few,
To know that my words have hit home, to know that some of you knew,
That I was a person just like the rest, who could get these jumbled words out,
To know in life that I did my best, without having to raise complete hell and shout,
So I really do hope you've enjoyed this, I've gotten the words out of my head,
To release these feelings is complete bliss, as to the alternative of keeping them in instead,
You've gotten into my fantasy kingdom, and I will always remain just as true,
So these would be my words of wisodom, these words right from me to you.
[comments] => 1 [counter] => 148 [topic] => 69 [informant] => XxNights_ChildxX [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => poets )
From me to you

Contributed by XxNights_ChildxX on Saturday, 20th November 2004 @ 08:56:24 PM in AEST
Topic: poets



Walking down the road again, the somber silence abrupt,
I sense it every now and then, the feelings start to errupt,
The coldness of the bitter wind, my hair hiding the sadness,
Time passing that will never end, one inch away from madness,
Music blaring deep into my head, the only thing keeping me sane,
If I didn't have music I'd be dead, the echoes of song in my brain,
The subliminal lyrics of masquerade, the lies and all the truth,
As light dissapears into the shade, the passing years of youth,
The days and weeks pass by me, as if they were only mere moments,
Everything rushing by so blindly, in quick and rapid paced movements,
Then sooner of later my time will end, and life will have passed me by right then,
My love and words I'll want to send, but I will not have accomplished them my friend,
So this is why I am writing this poem, to be known by atleast a dear few,
To know that my words have hit home, to know that some of you knew,
That I was a person just like the rest, who could get these jumbled words out,
To know in life that I did my best, without having to raise complete hell and shout,
So I really do hope you've enjoyed this, I've gotten the words out of my head,
To release these feelings is complete bliss, as to the alternative of keeping them in instead,
You've gotten into my fantasy kingdom, and I will always remain just as true,
So these would be my words of wisodom, these words right from me to you.




Copyright © XxNights_ChildxX ... [ 2004-11-20 20:56:24]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: From me to you (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Thursday, 25th November 2004 @ 05:09:59 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Hmnnnnnn.

I'm the first to comment on this double-rhyme?

I've only ever tried a few double-rhymes, when incidentally, i was either bored or wanted a serious challenge. I don't try them anymore, as they tend to constrict my attention towards rhyming instead of expression - but the ones I did that just 'came out' (like yours) I think are some of my best ever poems.

You use rhyme with ease. I will now go read some more of your poems, night's child.

Well done, and don't get discouraged by any such lack of attention you think you're receiving - a readership takes time, but if you keep submitting poems like this, people will take notice eventually.

Keep writing.




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