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Array ( [sid] => 51378 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => I just wanted to do it right this time... [time] => 2004-06-10 21:22:40 [hometext] => I tried to kill myself...I didnt cut deep enough or I didnt cut right... [bodytext] => Have you ever felt the preesures?
and just turned your back...
Was it the fear of love
or something you couldn't hack?
I've been thrown away,
chewed up, and spat out...
without them ever knowing what I was about
I hate people thinking they know exactly who you are
when they never took the time to find you when you were so far
I wanna beat their asses
make them forget who they are
yesterdau I broke down
my smile was turned to a frown
I was laying in the bathroom
drowning in my blood
I was drowning in my wrethched, hopeful flood
I know the cause of this
tell me though why did I deserve this?
to lose all of my bliss, my tryst with you
I thougt maybe after all of this you'd
you'd be there telling me it's ok
I hate living like this
having everyday a bad day
This isn't fair...
I didn't die this time
I wasn't even close
when all the other times...
it was just what I chose
I swear the other times...
I saw a light...
but I shaded my eyes...
for it was to bright...
I guess thi time, I didn't cut right
[comments] => 8 [counter] => 180 [topic] => 36 [informant] => Living_In_My_Dream [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 9 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )
I just wanted to do it right this time...

Contributed by Living_In_My_Dream on Thursday, 10th June 2004 @ 09:22:40 PM in AEST
Topic: Suicide



Have you ever felt the preesures?
and just turned your back...
Was it the fear of love
or something you couldn't hack?
I've been thrown away,
chewed up, and spat out...
without them ever knowing what I was about
I hate people thinking they know exactly who you are
when they never took the time to find you when you were so far
I wanna beat their asses
make them forget who they are
yesterdau I broke down
my smile was turned to a frown
I was laying in the bathroom
drowning in my blood
I was drowning in my wrethched, hopeful flood
I know the cause of this
tell me though why did I deserve this?
to lose all of my bliss, my tryst with you
I thougt maybe after all of this you'd
you'd be there telling me it's ok
I hate living like this
having everyday a bad day
This isn't fair...
I didn't die this time
I wasn't even close
when all the other times...
it was just what I chose
I swear the other times...
I saw a light...
but I shaded my eyes...
for it was to bright...
I guess thi time, I didn't cut right




Copyright © Living_In_My_Dream ... [ 2004-06-10 21:22:40]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by holderofthestone on Thursday, 10th June 2004 @ 09:25:11 PM AEST
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to tell ta the truth, Im gald you didnt do it right, then I wouldnt be able to read your incredible poems! Its tough sometimes I know the feeling, A++++ very strong.


Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by Trisha on Thursday, 10th June 2004 @ 09:38:39 PM AEST
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You Know People Really Do Care About You. Why Do You Want To Hurt Yourself When They Want You Here


Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by rugby_player on Thursday, 10th June 2004 @ 09:47:52 PM AEST
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Good job. I to am glad you didn't do it right..then you and i wouldn't be friends.....you've helped see what i can be thank you


Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Thursday, 10th June 2004 @ 09:59:56 PM AEST
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I hate people thinking they know exactly who you are
when they never took the time to find you when you were so far

I am having a problem with that as well...and it really *****es me off. It's a little comforting to know I'm not the only one but...I'm sorry I had to find out through your painful poem :(


Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 08:24:09 AM AEST
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This is a very deep poem and I for one can understand where you're coming from, I also tried to end my life, but now I am stronger and much more stable I am so glad that I didn't, loved the poem,

takecare

Pixie xx


Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by LiquidChaos on Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 10:02:04 AM AEST
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i'd say i know exactly how you feel, but i don't know you that well. i will say however, that i've been there. it's not fun, but giving up isn't the answer. just hang in there, and keep writing. it can really help you open up new doors in your life.

keep it up!

addie


Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by wyrd_faerie on Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 11:19:34 AM AEST
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please don't give up...you have a beautiful soul, it shines in this poem...


Re: I just wanted to do it right this time... (User Rating: 1 )
by waos on Friday, 11th June 2004 @ 11:00:38 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
i know how you feel hun. techically i didn't cut right either...but it's more like i wasn't let to cut. i sorta sympathise.

i'm glad you're okay.

good poem.




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