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Casey
Contributed by
lildrama04
on
Monday, 24th May 2004 @ 02:10:25 AM in AEST
Topic:
dedicatedpoems
|
Casey
You tell me that you
are better then you deserve
but you are never good
or amazing
You tell me your a christian
but whenever I talk to you
You are always sad
I wish I never the reason
you are this way you mean
so much to me its hard to believe
but you are light a brother to me and
Not just through Christ Either
You tell me that you want to come
home but why don't you just come pack
your bags and just come we all miss you
And want you to come home.
You tell me that I shouldn't
be so depressed but why are you
you never seem happy when I talk to you
You always seem sad
Is it cause you miss us so
Is it cause you don't think God is still
in your life and that you would rather end
You hurt me so much whenever
you say that you are better
than you deserve
You are never better then you deserve
you don't deserve to have the devil come after
to and you don't deserve everything that is happening
to you
Please won't you please
tell me whats going on
I love you like a brother
and you never confide in my
You tell me all this stuff about
Jesus dieing on the cross for our sins
but do you still believe it.
Copyright ©
lildrama04
... [
2004-05-24 02:10:25]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Casey
(User Rating: 1 )
by lildrama04 on
Tuesday, 25th May 2004 @ 01:50:27 PM AEST
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| anybody who reads this will you please leave a comment. |
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Re: Casey
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cole on
Wednesday, 16th June 2004 @ 11:38:16 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
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| Ok. The general text of this poem is really good. So don't get me wrong when I put it down in a few seconds. I think if you would just go through and edit it, it could be something ten times better. If you could just correct spelling errors, add punctuation in appropriate places and other small and picky things, I think it would make a big difference. I don't know if you were trying to make it seem casual like that, but it's too relaxed and unoranized, making it hard to understand in places. |
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