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Array ( [sid] => 44682 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => PoeTiC DeaTH [time] => 2004-04-24 22:33:07 [hometext] => This one is raw and untouched, I have not made any changes at all to it which may or may not be a good thing, I dont personally like it that much, but I was trying a new style of writing, I wanna see what feed back I get...It's about the perfect suicide [bodytext] => She, He, Me, It
Her, him, I, Us
With each repose a bloodless entry
In the devil's heated palace.

For He, Me, It
For, Her, I, Us
Smoke rises revealing the nightmarish reality
"This is what I wished and waited for?"

Bludgeoned over the head with mindless ramble
Years of wonder and praise devoured
Skylines, sun sets and sun rises
A death plague that is so over powered.

Look around at the lifeless faces
Search for one body containing a soul
Aimless wandering until the last breath
A poetic death is our goal. [comments] => 7 [counter] => 257 [topic] => 36 [informant] => strange_lindsey [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 24 [ratings] => 5 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )

PoeTiC DeaTH

Contributed by strange_lindsey on Saturday, 24th April 2004 @ 10:33:07 PM in AEST
Topic: Suicide

She, He, Me, It
Her, him, I, Us
With each repose a bloodless entry
In the devil's heated palace.

For He, Me, It
For, Her, I, Us
Smoke rises revealing the nightmarish reality
"This is what I wished and waited for?"

Bludgeoned over the head with mindless ramble
Years of wonder and praise devoured
Skylines, sun sets and sun rises
A death plague that is so over powered.

Look around at the lifeless faces
Search for one body containing a soul
Aimless wandering until the last breath
A poetic death is our goal.

Copyright © strange_lindsey ... [ 2004-04-24 22:33:07]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: PoeTiC DeaTH (User Rating: 1 )
by silentrain07 on Saturday, 24th April 2004 @ 10:34:52 PM AEST
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this was good...i liked it...keep up the good work

Re: PoeTiC DeaTH (User Rating: 1 )
by mountainhigh on Sunday, 25th April 2004 @ 12:20:26 AM AEST
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hmmmmmm poetic to me is justice served...........and to kill ones self..........hmmmmmmmm

Thanks for sharing.

Re: PoeTiC DeaTH (User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on Sunday, 25th April 2004 @ 12:46:09 AM AEST
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raw and untouched? somehow I don't see that... what I do see is a great poem.

Bobo (Joel)

Re: PoeTiC DeaTH (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Sunday, 25th April 2004 @ 01:11:02 AM AEST
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intense write here I enjoyed this
michelle

Re: PoeTiC DeaTH (User Rating: 1 )
by silent on Sunday, 25th April 2004 @ 04:59:48 AM AEST
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hmm, if real suicide is what you meant i didn't find that in this for some reason. What i did find is a very well written and insightful poem, which is quite deep. Anyway enjoyed it alot, keep it up.

Silent

Re: PoeTiC DeaTH (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Monday, 26th April 2004 @ 04:00:38 AM AEST
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interesting contemplating, seems as if the end result was not wanted nor as the person thought it would be, the he, she, him, i, us, kinda threw me; but its brilliant, took me a minute, lol:) hugs n' love nessa

Re: PoeTiC DeaTH (User Rating: 1 )
by MilitaryPrince on Saturday, 5th June 2004 @ 08:35:42 PM AEST
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"Aimless wandering until the last breath
A poetic death is our goal."

I really enjoyed this piece...the last stanza was awesome, and if that is really a raw poem then bravo! you have some extrodinary talent my friend...so strange how aimless wandering in life can give you some of the worst experiences and produce horrible poetry, yet sometimes it can lead you to some of your best experiences and produce amazing poetry.

great write! keep that pen of yours flowing!!

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