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Array
(
[sid] => 34066
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Lillies White
[time] => 2004-02-06 07:55:16
[hometext] => This is written in memory of a close friend of mine who decided to take his own life. It is my response, a year on, to his forgiveness for something I could never forgive
[bodytext] => She walks down the aisle Flowers white Simple dress In her hands the vows of another man Made to be read this day With faltering voice she stands and reads a poem from thee to me ****** Thank you for your shining light I wish I could shine as bright Your embrace was scorching hot Full of passion, love and hate Not of me or you but hate for what they made us do I want to say without you I would never lived to see A world with sunshine bright And starlight's might You helped me count the patterns and escape the hell that you and me know too well. ***** She bit her lip and looking up Cast a glance to the dark Man sitting in the back She took a sigh and dived inside the poem read out loud. ***** I want to say I'm sorry but I do not blame myself Your's was the weakness the depraved soul. I only say I'm sorry, For not being more For being a son you couldn't love without hurt But I have to thank you as well you don't know how much you've done I found the two for my one Without knowing you, Can't you see, I wouldn't know me. But most of all I need to say I forgive you for using me I forgive you for being weak For being the user of me. But I can not forgive you for not being what you Should have been ******* She wiped a tear of smudged love away From her failing cheek Hands trembling she continued, and didn't look to see ******* Please don't blame me for What I chose to do, And do not blame yourselves for not helping me through all your best efforts Would be made in vain My mind was set, My soul insane You could not have done more than what you did. You are not to blame for my course set Grieve for me if you must but don't condem yourselves Your souls are pure and clean Mine was made of rust Thank you though for what you did Want you to know, it was enough ******* She set the flowers, lillies white Upon his resting arms and whispering she spoke to you the words you wrote to her. ******* You are the brightest light I know A star so bright the sun just glows When you are by my side What happened to us was wrong What happened with us was right I'll never forget the morning light of summer night's you spent by my side I don't blame you for hurting I don't balme you for going I love you for being there when I was low and handing me a platter with you love piled high. You are the only thing that kept me on. I'm sorry it wasn't enough [comments] => 2 [counter] => 336 [topic] => 61 [informant] => winged [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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