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Must Have Done Something Wrong
Contributed by
crlepley
on
Monday, 26th January 2004 @ 11:10:33 AM in AEST
Topic:
LostLove
|
if i die before i wake i just want to let you know you will never be replaced i do not know how i can show how much you meant to me i do not know what i did i must have done something wrong i wish i could say it without taking so long i know now what you meant to me you meant more than reality i dont know how to put my heart back together cause you broke it into pieces i just wish sometimes we were together again everytime we kissed it shot through my veins everytime you said i love you i felt i couldnt control the reins i am tired of how much it just rains... down on me the feeling of my heart being drained i must have done something wrong all the love just cant be gone it takes more than just one night tell me what i didnt do right ill still always love you times infinity and plus the stars ill always love you love you with all my might.
Copyright ©
crlepley
... [
2004-01-26 11:10:33] (Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Must Have Done Something Wrong
(User Rating: 1 ) by alecfernadez on
Monday, 26th January 2004 @ 11:50:39 AM AEST (User
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a Message)
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| This poem is really good, it flows really really well, and your feelings are shown perfectly through out the poem. One small critism, one of which I do all the time, is that some lines are too big and cut up the flow of the poem. The best way to keep up a regular beat is sometimes to use a maximum number of sylabols. But otherwise its pretty much an excellent write |
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Re: Must Have Done Something Wrong
(User Rating: 1 ) by Necromant on
Monday, 26th January 2004 @ 01:26:27 PM AEST (User
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Wow Beautiful touching and loving! Great write!
Anne :D |
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