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Array
(
[sid] => 17504
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => To Whom It May Concern
[time] => 2003-05-13 13:05:00
[hometext] => suicide note. unsettlingly close to home.
[bodytext] => to whom it may concern
my name isn't Cancer, it's roy
and though i have the body of an adult
inside, i'm just a frightened little boy
i'm scared to death of life itself
i'm scared of the thoughts inside my mind
i'm afraid that i'm going insane
and i'm afraid to die
for, if i'm dead, i can't protect
my wife and my son
but, even as i'm writing this
i'm still loading a gun
i know there are people trying to kill me
but i do not know why
and for reasons i don't understand
when i'm alone, i breakdown and cry
to whom it may concern
you do not know me
you only know the mask i wear
you only see what i want you to see
i have lied and bluffed for so damn long
i've forgotten how to be myself
and when i look around, i've no one to blame
for this living ***** hell
my wife tries so hard, but she can't understand
she's not the reason i feel this way
i just don't see the reason, what difference it would make
for me to live another day
i cannot blame my parents
for the way i chose to be
my dad and i had our differences
but, he didn't do this to me
and all the idiots around me
aren't capable of all of this
and, try as i might, i can't blame god
because he does not exist
scapegoats abound, in every form,
as far as the eye can see
but, when i'm all alone, and the truth comes out
it all comes down to me
this hell is my own design
there is no one else to blame
but, no matter whose fault it is
the end is still the same
to whom it may concern
i could have burned this whole world down
but, now i'm the one down on my knees
crying without a sound
the gun on my tongue
tears in my eyes
trapped inside my own creation
a carnival of lies
i am nothing, i do not matter
this is the lesson i have learned
there will be no one to send these words
no one to whom it may concern
[comments] => 9
[counter] => 355
[topic] => 13
[informant] => Cancer
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 5
[ratings] => 1
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => DarkPoetry
)
To Whom It May Concern
Contributed by
Cancer
on
Tuesday, 13th May 2003 @ 01:05:00 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
to whom it may concern
my name isn't Cancer, it's roy
and though i have the body of an adult
inside, i'm just a frightened little boy
i'm scared to death of life itself
i'm scared of the thoughts inside my mind
i'm afraid that i'm going insane
and i'm afraid to die
for, if i'm dead, i can't protect
my wife and my son
but, even as i'm writing this
i'm still loading a gun
i know there are people trying to kill me
but i do not know why
and for reasons i don't understand
when i'm alone, i breakdown and cry
to whom it may concern
you do not know me
you only know the mask i wear
you only see what i want you to see
i have lied and bluffed for so damn long
i've forgotten how to be myself
and when i look around, i've no one to blame
for this living ***** hell
my wife tries so hard, but she can't understand
she's not the reason i feel this way
i just don't see the reason, what difference it would make
for me to live another day
i cannot blame my parents
for the way i chose to be
my dad and i had our differences
but, he didn't do this to me
and all the idiots around me
aren't capable of all of this
and, try as i might, i can't blame god
because he does not exist
scapegoats abound, in every form,
as far as the eye can see
but, when i'm all alone, and the truth comes out
it all comes down to me
this hell is my own design
there is no one else to blame
but, no matter whose fault it is
the end is still the same
to whom it may concern
i could have burned this whole world down
but, now i'm the one down on my knees
crying without a sound
the gun on my tongue
tears in my eyes
trapped inside my own creation
a carnival of lies
i am nothing, i do not matter
this is the lesson i have learned
there will be no one to send these words
no one to whom it may concern
Copyright ©
Cancer
... [
2003-05-13 13:05:00]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by M on
Tuesday, 13th May 2003 @ 01:18:28 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Ohh, Cancer, this is such a sad poem. Please try and stay here, you do matter to loads of people, i find that my reason for staying here are my friends, and so think about what you'll be leaving behind (if the words of your poem are true). love and hope, Emily |
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 0 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 13th May 2003 @ 01:50:22 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Cancer please dont do it please. Ok i had one of my dear friends do that and now i have this feeling inside that can never be replace this loss of a friend of a loved one it will never be the same. Please stay
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by Rage on
Tuesday, 13th May 2003 @ 01:52:53 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Damn, a great and emotional poem. Very dark and captivating. Great write. Hope all is well though...
Happier Dayz,
~*~RAGE~*~ |
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on
Tuesday, 13th May 2003 @ 03:33:41 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Roy so sad I loved this. Thnx for yer honesty and I hope you got all your feelings onto the piece of paper. I loved it all... wow I don't know what to say. Just know I'm here for you man.
Bobo (Joel) |
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by wyrd_faerie on
Tuesday, 13th May 2003 @ 05:17:36 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| ooh...this is such an amazing poem...i don't really know what to say...this is so sad...please don't do it, there's always something worth it all... |
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Wednesday, 14th May 2003 @ 03:03:51 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This is heart breaking. Im so sorry that you feel this way. Please stay around. Im not meaning to lecture you but all of our downs in this world make us stronger once we over come them some how.Thats the hardest part, over coming all the ills that befall us day to day. If you need to chat shoot me a message. Im your friend even from a distance!!
Michelle
PS I had a friend who just killed himself. It leaves a scar so deep it wont be filled.................. |
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by DreamWeaver on
Wednesday, 14th May 2003 @ 04:13:59 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| Excellent write ... hits home. |
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by Wrybod on
Thursday, 15th May 2003 @ 01:45:02 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
What makes you think your so different to the rest of us?
We have turned this planet into a sordid mess. It would be a far nicer place if only.....IF ONLY ..... we were nor here.
Oh yes we have created niches and "resorts" where for a moment or two a few can enjoy life but they are rare and short lived. |
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Re: To Whom It May Concern
(User Rating: 1 )
by tinka_belle on
Saturday, 28th June 2003 @ 02:13:28 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
we all wear a mask sometimes
and sometimes we get so used to wearing that mask that we forget who we really are
you are something
you are an amazing poet
and you can send me your words
any time
for i will be concerned
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