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Array
(
[sid] => 17501
[catid] => 1
[aid] => Mick
[title] => Untitled
[time] => 2003-05-13 11:35:00
[hometext] => another love/suicide scrawl
[bodytext] => in our room with all your things
the things you left behind prisoner in this house, no longer a home going out of my mind pictures of you adorn the walls a poor replacement for your smile even though i know it's stupid i talk to them once in awhile all your art, your poems, your knick-knacks painful mementos of your life and when i'm at my lowest i stare at your knife and cry i should have figured it out when you started cutting again but i just passed it off as a phase you must have felt so alone in the end but now i'm the lonely one left with Nothing but the past and as many pills as they've got me on i fear the memories won't last at night i think, i cannot sleep it eats me up inside how flippantly i dismissed the notion of your suicide i assumed you were ok i ignored all of the signs just carried on, and now you're gone HOW COULD I HAVE BEEN SO ***** BLIND i hate you because you were so selfish killing yourself and leaving me i envy you, for i am shackled to the past and you, my love, are free i miss you more than these tears can show i can't sleep alone in this bed and no matter how much i drink at night i still can't get you out of my head i really miss you sweetie and i hope you miss me too please don't think me weak but, this is all that i can do so when i pull this trigger i pray that you're the next thing that i see so we can be together forever the way it was meant to be [comments] => 4 [counter] => 260 [topic] => 13 [informant] => Cancer [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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