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| Welcome ! | Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link | 11-June 01:59:36 AEST | ||
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Array
(
[sid] => 165374
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => The long lost Love.....
[time] => 2011-03-19 16:53:15
[hometext] => I don't rightfully know if you can consider this as a Poem. This is more of an experience. enjoy.
[bodytext] => i remember the day i saw you...your braces...chubby cheeks....kinda quiet....nerdy......kind of awkward looking.....yet nice...sweet....timid...friendly.........but not enough to catch my eye and my attention...there were things and others on my mind...none that that i noticed in you......you were just a friend...a companion...someone to talk to....just another person in my short lived life....high school....school in general....was weird...different...perplexing....uninteresting.....yet i was known as some druggie....carefree.....badass....flirt.....player.....none of them describes who i really am.....ive faced turmoils and abuse.....hate....anger...sadness...depression....suicidal... yet i reached my limit......ive reached the pinnacle of my tolerance of my self indulged pain and temporary remedy of self denial and ignorance.......i felt that i couldnt go on....behind the mask...vase....curtains...shadow.... behind it all...that small light...that small ray of hope and happness.....i reached for it countless times...yet denied...rejected...turned down....drowned...... i left what i had behind..... without looking back...behind the faces of those i called friends..... i cried....i weeped....i poured....i consumed.....all the sadness of my heart...adding in the fuel of the torture that dwelled within my concious dreams......i deployed.....killed....saved.....survived....wept.....regret.....raged.... I came back a whole different person....i cared for noone and nothing...i wanted to be alone and not cared for....i wanted someone to just hit me..run me over...stab me...shoot me... kill me..... i didnt care for myself...... i indulged...reckless....selfish....stupid....... drank..... fought...... i was considered unstable...unreliable...undependable...... yet i overcame everything...i overcame myself and fought on.....yet i felt exhausted...tired... then i met you...i talked to you again.... i was happy i was talking with you...i couldnt wait for your next message....then i saw you....in your amish knee-length dress....your smile....your radiance...your warmth...your embrace.....i felt it all....i felt myself again....i felt joy again....i started to feel myself again....the numbess went away.....i felt what i did before...yet not as the ignorant boy...but a man with experience....a man aware....a man in love..... ive had experienced with others before......but with you far surpasses those ive been with...the innocence...the unpredictable nature....the thrill of the aftermath....the happiness of the moment....the warmth of the feeling...the tingling of the nerves..... the aftermath love after the day..... i cant deny the anger i had towards the one that casted your shadow....i cannot deny my sadness by the shadow casted back at me....i cannot look away from the obvious.......yet i still stick on...hoping to see that face....hoping to see your smile....that was once covered with metal.....hoping to kiss your cheeks.....that was once chubby.....hoping to hold you again.....the body that was once awkward looking..... i hope for the day when the place covered with cold white...... i parked......called.....waited......for that familiar shadow....the familiar scent..the familiar smile and walk....the awkward walk..... so unnnerving and exciting.....i wait for the day i run to you and you to me...and embrace the past with extreme glory and tearjerking happiness...the happiness so strong that no matter how hard we try.....we cannot help but cry...within each others embrace....we cry...i missed you....i missed you too....im so happy....im happy too....im hungry.....i'll feed you....im ugly.....youre so beautiful.....im cold....use my heat..... im sorry...dont be.......within those tears and heavy throat and heart.....three words would come out within myself like the flow of the calming wind..... I Love you....... [comments] => 1 [counter] => 104 [topic] => 31 [informant] => Kmart66 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => StoryPoetry )
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