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Array
(
[sid] => 164977
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => My choice to make
[time] => 2011-02-25 09:51:29
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => I have a choice to make, do I stay and wait or move on alone? Do I wait to see if the woman I love wants what I want in life? Her words tell me she does, but her actions say other wise. So what do I do? Do I listen to my heart or my head? My heart tells me to wait, give her time, be patent. My head, I don't know what my head wants. Sometimes it agrees with my heart, tells me she's the one. My true love of my life, the woman of my dreams, and my true shot at happiness. At other times, it tells me that she is on the fence, that she won’t decide, or can’t decide. That by picking me she is letting go of her ex, and not just for herself, but for her daughter. She tells me he will move and then he will never see his daughter again. How can I ask that of her? Or push for what I know will hurt her daughter? I would love to take his place as his daughters’ father... If he can’t see what he has then he does not deserve it. So I sit and wait, buying my time, hoping she will decide, but knowing in my heart that she will not. That this is what my life is going to be. A life of sharing my girl friend with her ex out of her fear of him leaving. Out of her fear to have done to her daughter what was done to her. The loss of her dad. The cause of so many issues in her life, maybe even part of why we are together, I'm not sure. So I'll stay, loving a woman that can’t give herself to me fully. Taking what I can because when life is good... It’s so amazing, and that is worth any hurt and pain I feel, right? [comments] => 0 [counter] => 200 [topic] => 13 [informant] => cssdman [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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