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My Love For You
Contributed by
Amorita
on
Sunday, 20th April 2008 @ 08:05:32 PM in AEST
Topic:
LovePoetry
|
You fill me with your presence
Like a breath of fresh air
And I know you always care
Though the times get tough
Like the weather gets rough
To the end youre always there
And I will be here for you
When the day is through
When the Sun goes; down down down
And the moon comes shining through
You see right through me
Like a mirror in the sea
And I know you always care
Though the times get rushed
Like our love gets crushed
To the end youre always there
And I will be here for you
When the day is through
When the Sun goes; down down down
And the moon comes shining through
When the Sun goes; down down down
And the moon comes shining through
And the moon comes shining through
Copyright ©
Amorita
... [
2008-04-20 20:05:32]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: My Love For You
(User Rating: 1 )
by whome on
Sunday, 20th April 2008 @ 11:29:18 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
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I know that many songs are in fact a poem written in a particular way, but this poem is to me more like a song.
I had trouble understanding why you structured your stanzas the way you did. Neither 3 or 4 lines but a mixture. I feel that what started out as a good poem faded into an average song.
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