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Array ( [sid] => 139843 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => When Voices Are Gone [time] => 2008-01-16 08:36:23 [hometext] => [bodytext] => That lingering voice in the back of my head
Telling me everything I lack,
Everything i'm not good enough to possess,
Every fault in my frail human frame.

I hate it, try to cover it, deny its existence
But it comes back to haunt when voices are gone.
It is only that voice
Menacing and degrading, and filling me with shame.

"You've brought this upon yourself,
Of course you dont deserve your dignity,
You dont even deserve a voice to listen to you.
But I'll listen, it says, and take pleasure in that pain.

I am the voice, i talk to your friends too
Yes, manipulative aren't i?
I've made sure you are treated with disgust
At the slightest mention of me."

Sadistic scent to the air.
It has me defeated, but not totally sure
Something might courageously divert despair
Is anybody there?
...Are they not aware? [comments] => 3 [counter] => 235 [topic] => 75 [informant] => disgracefully-yours [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => anguished )

When Voices Are Gone

Contributed by disgracefully-yours on Wednesday, 16th January 2008 @ 08:36:23 AM in AEST
Topic: anguished

That lingering voice in the back of my head
Telling me everything I lack,
Everything i'm not good enough to possess,
Every fault in my frail human frame.

I hate it, try to cover it, deny its existence
But it comes back to haunt when voices are gone.
It is only that voice
Menacing and degrading, and filling me with shame.

"You've brought this upon yourself,
Of course you dont deserve your dignity,
You dont even deserve a voice to listen to you.
But I'll listen, it says, and take pleasure in that pain.

I am the voice, i talk to your friends too
Yes, manipulative aren't i?
I've made sure you are treated with disgust
At the slightest mention of me."

Sadistic scent to the air.
It has me defeated, but not totally sure
Something might courageously divert despair
Is anybody there?
...Are they not aware?

Copyright © disgracefully-yours ... [ 2008-01-16 08:36:23]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: When Voices Are Gone (User Rating: 1 )
by AnenaLynne on Wednesday, 16th January 2008 @ 01:37:22 PM AEST
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wow, ive felt like that many times. loved the raw emotion...very nice read!
~nena

Re: When Voices Are Gone (User Rating: 1 )
by enigma on Thursday, 17th January 2008 @ 11:37:30 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

disgracefully-yours,

What you have described is the engine that drives mankind. Honestly, it is. Only the isolated and brave are strong enough to admit it, but this is the fear that keeps everyone of us running. Nice job. You are definitely not alone.

ron...enigma

Re: When Voices Are Gone (User Rating: 1 )
by little_genna on Tuesday, 22nd January 2008 @ 01:57:44 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

i guess for everyone on some level they have this voice. i know i certainly do and for ages it kept me from allowing myself to do things because it was always like "you'll make a fool of yourself" "everyone will laugh at you" "you dont deserve to be happy and laugh with them"

for ages i thought i was alone, but i begun to write and share myself with people on here, it helped.

i love your use of words and phrases. you evoke such fantastic imagry...

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