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Array
(
[sid] => 139569
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Render me in ruins
[time] => 2008-01-04 02:51:46
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => Why did I think you could ever love me? How can anyone love this brooding soul? What were you looking for? I know now it wasn't me Supposed, refined angels have now left me forlorn and cold How do people expect me to go on like nothing happened? They can't tell me what to do! They have no authority over me! I see now what the plot was; I was just a pawn to be depleted I can't believe I was so naïve, how could I not see? You acted like friends, you put up a good performance But you didn't know how many times I was hurt before I acted so happy; who was I trying to convince? You never even saw me; I can't act like this anymore I was tortured, I was alone, I was hated You didn't really care, you tore me apart This event should have been anticipated I had no hope left, I had an empty heart With tears in my eyes I walk a long way to you A gun in one hand, a crumpled paper in the other A look of terror in your eyes, you stay still, what else could you do? That deceiving face, I can't look at you any further I can't speak, the gun to my head, I pull the trigger The note falls from my hand, I fall to the floor, I still see you Your blood spattered face, your eyes grow bigger You did this to me, so this is what I had to do You take the note from where it was lying in the pool of blood You read it? Good, now you know what you put me through I hope you feel guilty as hell, as you look at my new metal stud I hope all of this is enough; I hope you shoot yourself too [comments] => 3 [counter] => 217 [topic] => 6 [informant] => MissTeenSuicide [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 19 [ratings] => 5 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => AngryPoetry )
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