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Array ( [sid] => 134980 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Our Little One Will Lose [time] => 2007-06-06 09:56:03 [hometext] => Divorce is so short-sighted and so destructive of the little ones [bodytext] => Our Little One Will Lose


Our Little One loses either way...
regardless who is awarded permanent physical custody,
she loses...
she will lose...
there can be no doubt,
if the present course continues unabated,
it will be unavoidable,
Our Little One will lose...
there is no other option for her,
other than losing...
the only unanswered question for Our Little One
is how badly will she lose...
such a shame,
experiencing this loss,
and only eight and a half years old...
there is no comfort in the knowledge millions have experienced just such a loss…
cynicism oozes from the claim,
kids are resilient,
or,
there is sufficient redundancy,
kids survive...
Our Little One is not just any other,
when she loses,
our little baby loses...
she loses...
survival is not good enough for our Our Little One...
whatever the custody decision is,
either way,
she loses...
Our Little One will not win in either case...

"Enough already!" you say...
Our Little Innocent will soon say the same,
and just as this poem deafly forges on,
her pain will just as deafly forge on...

In the midst of all our efforts to avoid discomfort,
elude pain,
circumvent anxiety,
and evade fear,
it needs be noted,
Our Trusting Child will be able to avoid,
elude,
circumvent,
and evade,
neither the discomfort,
nor the pain,
nor the anxiety,
nor the fear,
this decree of divorce has placed in her path...
as her parents did to survive amidst all their pain and degradation,
to survive, she too, will live a distorted reality,
this fits comfortably within the defining boundaries of,
Our Little One will lose...
she must lose...
we have given her no other choice but to lose...
she will lose...
she cannot win...
this totally dependent child will suffer loss...
in her innocence she will experience defeat...
a portion of her spirit will be squandered…
a measure of her energies exhausted…
her trust and confidence crippled…
her hopes consumed…
her fears fed…
and in its absence,
her smile,
made just that much more precious...
what we work so hard to avoid,
Our Child cannot...
what we obsessively strive to escape,
Our Child cannot...
all that we tirelessly endeavor to circumvent,
Our Child will have no choice but to endure...
our perceived gain,
is Our Child’s certain loss...

...as many times as there are stars in the sky,
the gods have sat idly by,
chatting,
sipping their afternoon tea,
while madness strips the innocence
from the innocents...
Damn!
...why would I dare entertain the hope,
my Child’s innocence would be held in any greater regard...

...and so,
barring the intervention of a greater diety,
though one of us,
may,
in a sense,
perhaps,
win,
for Our Child,
there is only one option:
Our Little One will lose.


No parent,
having caused the spilling of their innocent child's blood,
and thus betraying the sacredness of their own flesh,
will feel Love’s warmth again,
except the blue flames of catharsis,
purify their soul.

Kyrie Eleison.



rko
march thirteenth, two thousand, six
two, eleven, p. m.
[comments] => 3 [counter] => 166 [topic] => 21 [informant] => enigma [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )
Our Little One Will Lose

Contributed by enigma on Wednesday, 6th June 2007 @ 09:56:03 AM in AEST
Topic: Lifepoems



Our Little One Will Lose


Our Little One loses either way...
regardless who is awarded permanent physical custody,
she loses...
she will lose...
there can be no doubt,
if the present course continues unabated,
it will be unavoidable,
Our Little One will lose...
there is no other option for her,
other than losing...
the only unanswered question for Our Little One
is how badly will she lose...
such a shame,
experiencing this loss,
and only eight and a half years old...
there is no comfort in the knowledge millions have experienced just such a loss…
cynicism oozes from the claim,
kids are resilient,
or,
there is sufficient redundancy,
kids survive...
Our Little One is not just any other,
when she loses,
our little baby loses...
she loses...
survival is not good enough for our Our Little One...
whatever the custody decision is,
either way,
she loses...
Our Little One will not win in either case...

"Enough already!" you say...
Our Little Innocent will soon say the same,
and just as this poem deafly forges on,
her pain will just as deafly forge on...

In the midst of all our efforts to avoid discomfort,
elude pain,
circumvent anxiety,
and evade fear,
it needs be noted,
Our Trusting Child will be able to avoid,
elude,
circumvent,
and evade,
neither the discomfort,
nor the pain,
nor the anxiety,
nor the fear,
this decree of divorce has placed in her path...
as her parents did to survive amidst all their pain and degradation,
to survive, she too, will live a distorted reality,
this fits comfortably within the defining boundaries of,
Our Little One will lose...
she must lose...
we have given her no other choice but to lose...
she will lose...
she cannot win...
this totally dependent child will suffer loss...
in her innocence she will experience defeat...
a portion of her spirit will be squandered…
a measure of her energies exhausted…
her trust and confidence crippled…
her hopes consumed…
her fears fed…
and in its absence,
her smile,
made just that much more precious...
what we work so hard to avoid,
Our Child cannot...
what we obsessively strive to escape,
Our Child cannot...
all that we tirelessly endeavor to circumvent,
Our Child will have no choice but to endure...
our perceived gain,
is Our Child’s certain loss...

...as many times as there are stars in the sky,
the gods have sat idly by,
chatting,
sipping their afternoon tea,
while madness strips the innocence
from the innocents...
Damn!
...why would I dare entertain the hope,
my Child’s innocence would be held in any greater regard...

...and so,
barring the intervention of a greater diety,
though one of us,
may,
in a sense,
perhaps,
win,
for Our Child,
there is only one option:
Our Little One will lose.


No parent,
having caused the spilling of their innocent child's blood,
and thus betraying the sacredness of their own flesh,
will feel Love’s warmth again,
except the blue flames of catharsis,
purify their soul.

Kyrie Eleison.



rko
march thirteenth, two thousand, six
two, eleven, p. m.




Copyright © enigma ... [ 2007-06-06 09:56:03]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Our Little One Will Lose (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 6th June 2007 @ 10:37:08 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Ron,

This was compelling and powerful and sadly very true. I am coming from a place that your child will one day come from. I am the product of divorce. I assure you unfortunately that this is deeply true. Not that the effect does not haunt the mother and father, but nothing is more scarring to a child (from my perspective). The only hope I could dare give you is that this will learn your child of the world more. It's easier to protect a child in a "perfect" environment. Looking back, had my parents not ended their horrible marriage I would be a lot less emotional, a lot less of an abstract thinker, and a lot more arrogant and uncompromising.

It's a bittersweet cliche, but we have to see the good in the bad. The worst thing you could have done for your child is keep them in a loveless environment. These gives you both a chance to show your child love (beyond what you feel for them) but what you feel for others. A very emotionally draining, and sad work, but deeply poetic as always.

Thank you so much for having the strength to share with us this work. It drives home to me more than I can express. Good luck with your hardships. My prayers and sincere wishes are with you, your child, and your estranged.

- Daniel


Re: Our Little One Will Lose (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Wednesday, 6th June 2007 @ 12:13:34 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
This made me so sad to read, its emotional level so high and I feel it deeply.

I also came from a split family but...... had we stayed together noone would have survived .

I clearly remember the day of the final move and I was actually full of relief..... there was so much pain, drama, fighting and uncertainty in the household that is was a horrible existance for myself and my little brother, children I feel survive a split better than they do if they are involved in constant contempt in the home where they are supposed to feel safe and secure in. Every situation is different but my personal experience spelled good glad we are outta here. Was it hard YES..... did we do it YES... parents at times are better away and raising and being part of a childs life than together. Nomatter what she has both parents....

I pray it works out well for all of you and your little girl.

Michelle


Re: Our Little One Will Lose (User Rating: 1 )
by inlovewithaladd on Thursday, 12th July 2007 @ 09:46:18 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
daughters are made of the strongest stuff on earth. remember that.

again, a beautiful write. you inspire me.




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