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Array ( [sid] => 124200 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => IN SEARCH FOR WORDS [time] => 2006-08-07 22:29:59 [hometext] => struggling, here!! help! any sujestions? [bodytext] => in search for words
of my imaginative out spurts
I sit here weeks on in
with a hold of my pen
speechless, thoughtless, wordless
confused, lost, and unhumorous
my words my imagination
gone knotted up all wrong
unable to say my thoughts of life and love
unable to speak happiness and stuff
instead I feel as if I am dead
numb to the abuse that within me, I let
for once again you see
shock and trauma hit me
so I tied the pain within a rope again,
and threw it to the bottom of the ocean
drowned it live and whole
stuffed it shut and full
onward I went, relieved of such pain
gone, finally free of my way
yet words cannot come
feelings are not, they are gone
blank hearted blind sighted
yet tip toeing to a place newly heightened
of overcoming what could have damaged me
though still unable to scribble any such words
of depth or creativity, my thoughts are empty or sparse
as I cannot latch on to one thought in my head
no, I cannot grab onto a word or a sentence read
so yet I see, I let this kill me
unwilling to write about the misery
not wanting to face
only wanting a happy life embraced
so noticeably, it was onward I went
it was like the rain in the wind
smooth and refreshing
softly touching gracefully
yet my form un-solid
unstable and horrid
as I have no firm grasp
lost, and not soon to come back very fast
my talent gone, my hope and light numb
as I sit here with pen and paper
lost of words and emotional labor
killed by the devastation
of being lost in the wind
yet, if I say the words
and write about the parts
where I was mostly burned
would my ability to write return?
With pen and paper at hand
im ready to try again–

08-02-06 [comments] => 3 [counter] => 215 [topic] => 21 [informant] => Adelle [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Lifepoems )

IN SEARCH FOR WORDS

Contributed by Adelle on Monday, 7th August 2006 @ 10:29:59 PM in AEST
Topic: Lifepoems

in search for words
of my imaginative out spurts
I sit here weeks on in
with a hold of my pen
speechless, thoughtless, wordless
confused, lost, and unhumorous
my words my imagination
gone knotted up all wrong
unable to say my thoughts of life and love
unable to speak happiness and stuff
instead I feel as if I am dead
numb to the abuse that within me, I let
for once again you see
shock and trauma hit me
so I tied the pain within a rope again,
and threw it to the bottom of the ocean
drowned it live and whole
stuffed it shut and full
onward I went, relieved of such pain
gone, finally free of my way
yet words cannot come
feelings are not, they are gone
blank hearted blind sighted
yet tip toeing to a place newly heightened
of overcoming what could have damaged me
though still unable to scribble any such words
of depth or creativity, my thoughts are empty or sparse
as I cannot latch on to one thought in my head
no, I cannot grab onto a word or a sentence read
so yet I see, I let this kill me
unwilling to write about the misery
not wanting to face
only wanting a happy life embraced
so noticeably, it was onward I went
it was like the rain in the wind
smooth and refreshing
softly touching gracefully
yet my form un-solid
unstable and horrid
as I have no firm grasp
lost, and not soon to come back very fast
my talent gone, my hope and light numb
as I sit here with pen and paper
lost of words and emotional labor
killed by the devastation
of being lost in the wind
yet, if I say the words
and write about the parts
where I was mostly burned
would my ability to write return?
With pen and paper at hand
im ready to try again–

08-02-06

Copyright Â© Adelle ... [ 2006-08-07 22:29:59]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: IN SEARCH FOR WORDS (User Rating: 1 )
by Silent-No-More on Monday, 7th August 2006 @ 11:13:29 PM AEST
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Well, kudos! I experience this struggle far more often than I used to... stymied by the inability to find words enough to express what I need to, I'm almost entirely muted by the inability to do so. In my heart of hearts, I know it would be best to write something even if it is not what I most wanted to express - but I simply cannot. I envy you entirely for being able to put this on the page when, clearly, it was something else entirely that you were hoping to.

The words that you are seeking will come in there own time - and in the meantime, this is admirable (and probably much more, I suspect, than you realize).

Finding this relatable,
~Snemmy

Re: IN SEARCH FOR WORDS (User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on Tuesday, 8th August 2006 @ 03:17:33 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I find that your words aren't muted here you did a great job, keep up with it!
Michelle

Re: IN SEARCH FOR WORDS (User Rating: 1 )
by Claire890 on Tuesday, 8th August 2006 @ 06:14:05 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

found a few here eh? lol

claire

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