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Array
(
[sid] => 115616
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Trichotillomania (My Addiction)
[time] => 2006-03-01 03:45:37
[hometext] => Trichotillomania is an obsessive-compulsive disorder where people feel compelled to pull out their hair. I'm thankful that I have it mildly enough...
[bodytext] => The will to stop is everything to me, yet it means nothing, all the same. Now the only question to ask myself is simply, "Who's to blame?" Is this a sick affliction? A new kind of addiction? Or is this simply a nervous tick, to which I've no restriction? Some days it seems as though my hands are moving on their own -- as though they have a consciousness of which they've never shown... a consciousness that proves itself much stronger than my own. Since this began, I've done all that I can to stop it... I've done all that I've thought to do. And though a cure seems long overdue, this odd addiction, I still pursue...and each day, it begins anew. I wake with a promise, go to bed with a promise...I've tried and I've cried and I've bled for a promise... yet a promise to stop and to end all the slaughter is a promise so weak that it's written in water. I hold my wrists, tie up my hair... I offer God my saddest prayer. And it always seems to work until my will begans to tear. Then soon enough, restraint will fade and give in to thin air. I pull my hair out without even knowing it... tearing it out as fast as I'm growing it. This is my addiction, and I'm always showing it. [comments] => 2 [counter] => 1264 [topic] => 13 [informant] => Freak-of-the-Week [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 8 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )
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