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Array
(
[sid] => 101304
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Despair
[time] => 2005-07-15 22:03:21
[hometext] => A metaphor on private grief..
[bodytext] => I suffer from an impediment
a deaf mute in thought
the aggravated misunderstood apathy of others
shouting at me
from across the cosmic width
my undying want and need
gripping and rattling with bone bare knuckles
the bars of a subtle thought
begging to be released
begging heed
to be heard
and I hear
I heed
but I cannot reply
I am without keys
to either of our prisons
Our island souls
floating in this oceanic waste
our cries shipwrecked
tossed wearily into nowhere
no quiet shore to walk along
only my impassioned raging soul
impeded stuttering in its cage
helpless against iron-clad controls
to be a moment free
as it was meant to be
Unuttered
unmuttered thoughts
crushed in their brief doomed career
falling limp to earth between us
like dead leaves in a Mad Season
Despair a faithful lapdog a pet
safe unto its lonely master
watching the dumb human show
with sardonic eyes
waiting to be called home
as it will be
to the sick dying heart of another
M.O.H.
[comments] => 13
[counter] => 192
[topic] => 13
[informant] => Man_On_High
[notes] => (Poem edited for Spelling by Mod_11)
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 8
[ratings] => 2
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => DarkPoetry
)
Despair
Contributed by
Man_On_High
on
Friday, 15th July 2005 @ 10:03:21 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
I suffer from an impediment
a deaf mute in thought
the aggravated misunderstood apathy of others
shouting at me
from across the cosmic width
my undying want and need
gripping and rattling with bone bare knuckles
the bars of a subtle thought
begging to be released
begging heed
to be heard
and I hear
I heed
but I cannot reply
I am without keys
to either of our prisons
Our island souls
floating in this oceanic waste
our cries shipwrecked
tossed wearily into nowhere
no quiet shore to walk along
only my impassioned raging soul
impeded stuttering in its cage
helpless against iron-clad controls
to be a moment free
as it was meant to be
Unuttered
unmuttered thoughts
crushed in their brief doomed career
falling limp to earth between us
like dead leaves in a Mad Season
Despair a faithful lapdog a pet
safe unto its lonely master
watching the dumb human show
with sardonic eyes
waiting to be called home
as it will be
to the sick dying heart of another
M.O.H.
Copyright ©
Man_On_High
... [
2005-07-15 22:03:21]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by shelby on
Friday, 15th July 2005 @ 10:31:10 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| breath taking |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by brew on
Friday, 15th July 2005 @ 11:33:33 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| simpel yet.....deep.....always again a elegant write |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on
Friday, 15th July 2005 @ 11:56:03 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
I feel the 'pain' in these words...
Awesome write..
Jenni |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on
Friday, 15th July 2005 @ 11:57:24 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
Very moving write...wow. The second and last stanzas especially...Great expression Billy...
"I am without keys to either of our prisons..."
AND
"Despair a faithful lapdog a pet..."
Oh yes, know these feelings all too well...
Scorp. |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by MorningDove on
Saturday, 16th July 2005 @ 12:11:16 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Leaves the taste of an aching heart. Sad and chilling.
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Saturday, 16th July 2005 @ 10:51:35 AM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
A beajtiful poem written from the soul of an artist with true vision, well done bill . . .
Ben |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by jyssvw22 on
Saturday, 16th July 2005 @ 10:40:32 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
This was a real unique thought.
I was on the beach, then to a shipwreck in the ocean
Then with a pet I never owned
So many images
With a meaning to be deciphered on my own
Awesome as always
Thanks
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by sprinter27 on
Saturday, 16th July 2005 @ 10:41:30 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
great write! and as always, very deep. i enjoyed reading this one a lot. and i liked your choice of words, very well put. keep up the great work!
~sprints |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by waos on
Sunday, 17th July 2005 @ 12:39:43 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Amazingly gorgeous would describe that in my opinion. You did an
awesome job and I loved the entire thing so much. The imagery and, well,
loneliness it brought to my mind were nearly unmarveled by 'mere;
words. I loved this poem.
~Kara |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by allforyou on
Sunday, 17th July 2005 @ 12:47:00 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| so amazing.... |
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by wizard on
Monday, 18th July 2005 @ 07:02:57 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
excellent write B.
wiz
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by pUnKa_RaCh on
Sunday, 24th July 2005 @ 03:50:46 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Ur metophors were marvellous indeed Billy....
I could sense the despair in this poem and I especially loved the ending.
Matchless words again from you my friend.
A pleasure to read.
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Re: Despair
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Wednesday, 3rd May 2006 @ 07:38:51 PM AEST
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Info | Send
a Message)
|
You know Billy, I believe this to be one of the most incredible
and engrossing "metaphors on grief" I've even encountered.
Despair. Even the word itself is incredibly forlorn. But my God!
how well you have captured the emotion in flawless excellence.
Such a sad write and yet I can't help but be stunned in admiration.
You have a gift, dear Billy. (as I've mentioned to the point of
sickening exhaustion, I know! lol)
You are KING of the allegorical. You know that, right?
lol
This was [quite simply put] . . .brilliant!!
~Breezy
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