Array
(
[sid] => 186477
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => I Lost My Wife/'/s Life Savings
[time] => 2019-08-15 02:06:10
[hometext] => A fictional and funny poem.
[bodytext] => When I went to Las Vegas, I lost all of my money and I also lost my wife/'/s entire life savings.
I have no hair left on my body because she grabbed my electric razor and started shaving.
I told her to calm down and that she should be forgiving.
That really ticked her off and I/'/m lucky to still be living.
She said she was forgiving, she was for giving me a swift beating.
My jaw is wired shut and the doctor told me to forget about eating.
For only twenty-four hours, the Golden Corral was giving everybody a free buffet.
But I can/'/t even eat one morsel of food, so I had to turn it down, I/'/ve seen better days.
My wife is so ferocious that if she was a dinosaur, she would be a T-Rex.
I learned something as she kicked my butt, she/'/s not the weaker sex.
Her life savings came to a total of ninety grand.
She was my supervisor at work and I was canned.
She/'/s so furious because of what I did that she/'/s thinking about getting a divorce.
She sold my car to get some of her money back and I/'/m using a buggy and a horse.
I/'/m scared because of the angry and violent way that she has been behaving.
You/'/d better listen when I tell you not to gamble away your spouse/'/s life savings.
[comments] => 0
[counter] => 42
[topic] => 7
[informant] => randyjohnson
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 0
[ratings] => 0
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => HumorPoetry
)
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