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Array
(
[sid] => 186615
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => NurseMel
[time] => 2019-10-27 23:41:19
[hometext] => blissful tragedy
[bodytext] => Your feelings were as fake as your eternal lust for others even as the tears of tomorrow pour downward from a clear blue sky of denial and blissful anguish. Painful thoughts and memories churned just beneath the inner corridors of shame as the disbelief of betrayal rein supreme between lunch and dinner. Secrecy rein supreme even now as the blank stares coming from the other side of the street pierce the air; continual plotting encounter while simultaneously disregarding all others feeling and well being should comes as no surprise to anyone. Musky scents of youth and the oblivious naïve cherish small dog souls are all that is left now for us to squabble over and then again maybe not. I shall never pass this way again; momentarily thinking to myself as I watch old reruns of my current life fiasco play out in real time for all to see and ignore. Talk show laughter blares over a subtle back noise of taping cardboard boxes and mumbling voices accompanying a steadfast loneliness that approaches from underneath a hollow soul of what could have been. Once more I must embrace a near torturous future of my life alone within my own existence and eventually evolve into something other than I am now; becoming closer to my creator and my former self as well. Walking backward in time I asked my former self if I would be able to contemplate a future without love abound within; I answer myself as I always did without saying a word other than what I/'/ve always known yet would never embrace or accept. Torture emptiness are all mine to embrace now along with the suffocating thoughts and inept hopes continuously pressing against my bald head beneath a soft sparkle white goose down pillow of inept hopes as well as a brighter tomorrow. I am who I am, we are who we are and will always be. Some people will manage to evolve beyond what they currently are as our creator had always envision for us all; yet most will never amount to anything of significance and will fade away into an old rancid moist and soft graveyard soil of inglorious nothingness sooner or later. Hope rings eternal until it doesn/'/t anymore I/'/ve always say. Time waits around for no one other than itself; it should nonetheless be embrace fully and live within as well as cherished and embraced for what and all it/'/s worth. My life goals to forever avoid becoming someone else wasted moment or even worst a fading thoughts of blank air without finding and experiencing that elusive happily ever after I/'/ve sought for so long will be my blue ribbon event that once found I should forever cherish. Copyright © Johnny Hadnot 10.27.2019 [comments] => 1 [counter] => 363 [topic] => 48 [informant] => slogan [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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