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Array
(
[sid] => 186559
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => A Schizophrenic/'/s Journal
[time] => 2019-09-23 11:33:39
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => I Strained eyes for brief second close A sleeping pulse ignites as anticipation and anxiety grows With the 13th hour/'/s chime killing midnight/'/s silence As the cacophonous echo consumes empty passageways seeking penance While pall bearers prepare once more for their solemn procession Murderers of troubled souls they are; giving no release from the abjection Trembling footsteps upon checkered marble pace As shadows speak their treachery while having yet no face Where upon padded walls pseudo-innocent memories reside Colorful renditions drawn in crayon where childhood demons hide For the sun no longer shines through crayola panes Through which endless hours are spent dreaming of dancing in summer rains Wondering when the sun/'/s warmth will once more caress this wayward soul And sleepless eyes can rest reclaiming from them what was once stole II Fragments of colored paper are strewed across the floor With every footstep/'/s breath they dance; calling they do implore A shattering soul lies wandering aimlessly As nightmares dressed as memories test a weakened mind/'/s fragility With every passing second revealing a nearly forgotten detail That should have remained hidden within the shadows yet they prevail Their raspy screams resound and threaten Falling upon ears on a plane between Hell and Heaven Amongst the insane within these walls serenity is granted As glassy eyes stare blankly through an imaginary window enchanted Upon an artificial sunrise burned within unrested sight Surrounded by walls once untainted, pure white Now a technicolor biographical tome Bidding a wayward spirit; welcome home III Fleeting days to fleeting years Memories remain an incumbent of self-induced fears As once vibrant eyes turned lifeless, medications/'/ pawn Awaken reluctantly to a fluorescent dawn With silent whispers replacing consciousness Singing a lullaby that does not bring rest While accompanied by the tapping of hard rubber soles Resounding through dimly lit corridors and sedated souls Death/'/s hands carry forth unto hell their creation Until the footfalls cessation When the mind numbing silence is replaced by the eerie jingle of keys And a lock/'/s tumbler clicks the final countdown answering final pleas Setting a resolution date One day early yet one day too late IV The evening that the resolution came It vanished that evening just the same An escape that vaguely did just seem To fade away like a childhood dream With tongue now numbed Light-headed; mind has succumbed Staring blankly under heavy sedation Motionless in desolate isolation Memories flicker as if a fragile flame Once again just a number without a name Sitting upon the floor of a room often forgotten A prodigal son once; now no longer begotten Eyes dance behind lids/'/ reluctant closure As medications/'/ grasp weakens; relinquishing hold of its stolen treasure V Thoughts like wildfire have began to run A birth of a new dawn yet remaining under the glare of a fluorescent sun Rubbing temples gently caress Through their lies inner demons do confess Returning consciousness forcibly willed Perception of time no longer distilled Tiny marks have kept time covering the walls and door With pieces of plaster big and small now lining the checkered floor The lights flicker, a shadow stirs, welcome home old friend As black and white merge, there is no gray, this tunnel has no end In the midst of sound/'/s last breath Tumblers once again rise and fall with a whisper/'/s death Silence has a new chapter to the story wrought An exit/'/s gift a soul has bought VI By rite of passage through deafness, awareness is reawakened Sanity now tangible flexes and does bend Down an endless passageway countless footsteps are taken Though memories and thoughts constantly battle yet both have been forsaken Motion constant yet standing still No clocks in sight with time to kill As an indentured spirit unexpectedly found A timid mind to a fevered heart is bound Casting aside the corpse of an existence no longer needed Homage paid to a master whose words are perpetually heeded Imagination is the result of reality/'/s abjection Poised before a mirrored glass the image beheld is not a reflection To and fro gazing upon the ultimate corporeal question To have a life living in Hell or grasping death within Heaven ?? [comments] => 2 [counter] => 57 [topic] => 59 [informant] => farscape_prophet [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => psychoticpoems )
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