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Array ( [sid] => 185008 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => I/'/m America/'/s worst Driver [time] => 2018-04-01 17:23:09 [hometext] => [bodytext] => Where I live, a bunch of idiots work at the DMV.
They proved that by giving a drivers license to me.
When I drive, I constantly drive in the wrong lane.
Some people call me stupid, others call me insane.
If you/'/re on the same road while I/'/m driving,
you won/'/t have much of a chance of surviving.
I/'/ve wrecked so many cars that my insurance company no longer pays.
If you ever see me driving in your neighborhood, you really should pray.
If you/'/re out walking while I/'/m driving, you sure will need to get out of my way.
Because if you don/'/t, your next of kin will be informed that you/'/ve passed away.
I drive extremely bad during the night and even worse in the rain.
When I die, my body will be donated to science but they won/'/t accept my brain.
When people see me coming, they lose bladder control and pee.
The gospel truth is that even drunk drivers drive better than me.
[comments] => 1 [counter] => 36 [topic] => 7 [informant] => randyjohnson [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => HumorPoetry )
I'm America's worst Driver

Contributed by randyjohnson on Sunday, 1st April 2018 @ 05:23:09 PM in AEST
Topic: HumorPoetry



Where I live, a bunch of idiots work at the DMV.
They proved that by giving a drivers license to me.
When I drive, I constantly drive in the wrong lane.
Some people call me stupid, others call me insane.
If you/'/re on the same road while I/'/m driving,
you won/'/t have much of a chance of surviving.
I/'/ve wrecked so many cars that my insurance company no longer pays.
If you ever see me driving in your neighborhood, you really should pray.
If you/'/re out walking while I/'/m driving, you sure will need to get out of my way.
Because if you don/'/t, your next of kin will be informed that you/'/ve passed away.
I drive extremely bad during the night and even worse in the rain.
When I die, my body will be donated to science but they won/'/t accept my brain.
When people see me coming, they lose bladder control and pee.
The gospel truth is that even drunk drivers drive better than me.




Copyright © randyjohnson ... [ 2018-04-01 17:23:09]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: I'm America's worst Driver (User Rating: 1 )
by Durango on Wednesday, 4th April 2018 @ 09:27:32 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Appreciated the humor. I got a good laugh out of it.
Even worse in the rain, the poem escalates from bad driving to as bad as it gets. Loved it all.




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