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Array ( [sid] => 179374 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Broken Man [time] => 2014-09-30 18:08:07 [hometext] => Encouraged by the warm welcome, I have spent this evening on my second attempt. [bodytext] => Lucidity erupts from deep within
Obtundent calm born of chagrin
Emotions scattered, an acidic dust
Now splintered heart begins to rust
Choked of dreams he needs to breath
A broken man is on his knees
[comments] => 6 [counter] => 341 [topic] => 22 [informant] => maluku [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LostLove )

Broken Man

Contributed by maluku on Tuesday, 30th September 2014 @ 06:08:07 PM in AEST
Topic: LostLove

Lucidity erupts from deep within
Obtundent calm born of chagrin
Emotions scattered, an acidic dust
Now splintered heart begins to rust
Choked of dreams he needs to breath
A broken man is on his knees

Copyright © maluku ... [ 2014-09-30 18:08:07]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Broken Man (User Rating: 1 )
by ladyfawn on Tuesday, 30th September 2014 @ 06:31:26 PM AEST
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beautifully penned, excellent images, flow and style,

hugs n' love nessa

Re: Broken Man (User Rating: 1 )
by speedy on Tuesday, 30th September 2014 @ 08:33:02 PM AEST
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Great write!

Hannah B

Re: Broken Man (User Rating: 1 )
by RussellReinhardt on Tuesday, 30th September 2014 @ 11:57:31 PM AEST
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Yes love can make or brake anyone. Good write. God bless

Greetings
Rus

Re: Broken Man (User Rating: 1 )
by sanders on Wednesday, 1st October 2014 @ 05:40:52 AM AEST
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"A broken man on his knees"--great line....
Greetings

Re: Broken Man (User Rating: 1 )
by Puppy_dog_eyes on Friday, 3rd October 2014 @ 03:23:06 PM AEST
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I wouldn't call it an attempt so much as a triumph.
With the gift of eloquence you have fitted right in.
Nice write

Steve

Re: Broken Man (User Rating: 1 )
by hauntedscorp on Saturday, 4th October 2014 @ 09:39:49 AM AEST
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I'm sure you meant "breathe", but that is a minor detail. Anytime a writer can convey such a strong emotive response in so few words, is a success. I daresay your metaphorical (or actual) pen has been chomping at the bit for years! Look at that thing explode...Wonderful stuff. Don't stop now!

~Scorp

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