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Array
(
[sid] => 98819
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Flesh Made Coffin
[time] => 2005-06-21 09:26:02
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => It all come together. That i'm just all alone now. In this moonlit nightmare of mine. Tonight nothing will become real. I can't stand this lonliness. I can't stand this containment. Of this self control gripping hold of my wings and tearing them to pieces. As feathers litter my floor of my heart. I'll frown and growl to hold back the bitter tears, that are long overdue. Scream down the length of body. Not that long, but it eases the tension. I stare into windows and see hollowed eyes staring back at me. And all my dreams have gone. That i made as a child. All my hopes for the future i've created, break in front of my eyes. As every open door shuts me in. I'm dead on the outside, but screaming in my coffin of flesh. Lightly my fingertips open the windows in desperation for my breath of life to return to my body. I remember last year, where i felt so alive, and everyone knew. And i was around. And i was in the light of summers day. And i was everywhere. Anywhere you wanted me to be. I soared so high, so high. And nothing it felt, could stop me. Slowly when the summer died. I found my bed in brown leaves and i got swept away into the wind, and never came back. And so just this is left. And you can have my life, you can mould me now. I can't dream. No way its gonna come true now. I'll be your doll now. I'll carry on smiling i'll carry on laughing. I'll carrying on in this fake happiness. That keeps you alive and smiling too. And for you too i'll keep seeming to reach upwards, with big ideas, big dreams. Of which i know i can't do. No cure. Resounds in my head. I'll never show them. I'm in your basement, i'm in your head. Singing in my own way. Own tune. Just singing my bleeding heart out. Because i don't want to feel anymore. I'll give you my last drop of love that i can make. And i'll carry on this art of lying to everyone. Just for their sake. My last sacrifice. My only sacrifice. Maybe just one more. Living still, when i long to die. I miss you, and it's killing me each day, each time my chest moves with life. It crushes me inside. And in this air is the stench knowing, i don't belong here anymore. It's in everyones voice. It's the many mistakes and accidents. Where am i destined to go, and dragging him along. For my downwards spiral. I'm crashing, baby. And you've signed up for the ride. I'm spiralling down this hold towrds the firey pits of my hell, where i'll enternally burn. For all the pain i've caused. For all the lies i've told. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 186 [topic] => 59 [informant] => harlot20 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => psychoticpoems )
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