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Array
(
[sid] => 97415
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => MOTEL
[time] => 2005-06-09 10:59:59
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => To pain I laugh but to happiness I cry, That’s how my life is & yet I wonder why? Looking in the mirror wondering who am I, Acting happy & glad but its really just a lie. Most of the time my head is filled with anger, Stress & sadness comes in like a professional attacker. When I am quite please do not disrupt me, I’m thinking of solutions to the things I see. I’m trying to live a life that’s simple, A different way of living that I’m into. Never turn away it’s not to late, It can still happen at another rate. Time is slow, But I’ll go. First I have to show my pain, Everyone look at me , I’m not the same. Change for me change for you that’s all you said, Please leave me alone with the words that you left in my head. I have an infinite sadness, Help me I don’t understand this. Now it’s sure my life’s a waste for most of you, Should I risk it one more time for some one new. For pain I laugh for happiness I cry, There’s no reason I should lie. Come on forward bring it down, Live the life of the worthless clown. Sing a song that tells the truth, Make everyone cry out for reckless brutes. Maybe I’m just stupid but don’t run away, Maybe I’m just crazy but don’t run away. Now everything has settled but don’t run away, To pain I laugh but for happiness I cry, Don’t run away just don’t run away, Should my mind I kill, Or should I just conceal. My heart that’s grey. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 155 [topic] => 72 [informant] => Ranchan [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => self-harmpoetry )
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