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Array ( [sid] => 96995 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => It's Hard [time] => 2005-06-06 00:09:37 [hometext] => read and comment... thanks Wayne [bodytext] => Its hard to write a love song
When everyone knows you’re a thug
They expect you to be hard
But eventually you gotta do
What you long to
It’s hard to reveal your soul
And expose your emotions
When you lift up your shirt
And see nothing but a hole
It’s hard to live life
In this treacherous world
Wearing your heart on your sleeve
When everyone turns away
And no one gives you what you need
It’s hard to share
What your heart desires
When you look for the beating
And find nothing but pieces
The parts of your being
That never were
The missing ingredients
To feed the fire
That no longer burns
It’s hard to live life in this terror
Expecting hell at every turn
To wake up everyday
And expect the worse
To build a façade
And don a mask
To ignore the pain
And hide the hurt
To know that everyday
Is a little slice of hell
Reserved just for Wayne
Every room’s a prison
In its own little way
My only sanctuary
Is the world I fabricate
As this pen bleeds across the page
It etches for eternity
Words I can’t even utter
It’s hard to pick yourself up
And get out of the gutter
When the dirt seems permanent
And makes your heart hurt
Welcome to this glimpse
Of the life I live
Welcome to the projected image
Of the love I give
Its hard to live
And even picture a smile
When no one loves you
It seems like I’ve waited
For a long hard while
I’ve lost count of the days
Its taken to somehow manipulate
The words on the page
To craft them in a manner
As to express
Exactly what I want to say
It seems like my pads run over
With a meaning to everyline
I’ve managed to force out of my pen
Trying to force a poem
Out of a stanza
And I ain’t even got a word
Writers block
Keeps these emotions
Pent up inside
At some point
I must sit back
And enjoy the ride
Brace myself
And hope the life I was living
Never materializes
Into the punishment
I’ve been given
If truth has no alibi
Then why does deception
Infiltrate my mind
Why does reality
Seem like a lie
Why do I wake up everyday
Experiencing terrors
I can’t even say
Haw can a hurt
From so long ago
Constantly relapse
Forcing me to relive the pain
Can I reveal
The mystery that is me
To give you a phantom portrait
Of the depth of me
Could I waste 21 years
Just to end up here
Am I on the brink
Of just another fall
Or clinging to the edge
Of turning this
Jacked up life around
Because despite all my words
Nothing I said was ever heard
My heart breaking
No one listened
Because a broken heart
Never makes a sound
No one cared
Despite the crowd
No one even knew
No one tried to distinguish
The truth
Is it possible
To be able
To salvage my youth
When caught in the midst
Of the war that I’m in
I can’t even look to myself
To find a friend
Because of the war within
All I can do
Is set down my pen
To let you know
That this is THE END

© Wayne Wende
[comments] => 2 [counter] => 169 [topic] => 61 [informant] => swiftsouljah [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )

It's Hard

Contributed by swiftsouljah on Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 12:09:37 AM in AEST
Topic: selfstruggles

Its hard to write a love song
When everyone knows you’re a thug
They expect you to be hard
But eventually you gotta do
What you long to
It’s hard to reveal your soul
And expose your emotions
When you lift up your shirt
And see nothing but a hole
It’s hard to live life
In this treacherous world
Wearing your heart on your sleeve
When everyone turns away
And no one gives you what you need
It’s hard to share
What your heart desires
When you look for the beating
And find nothing but pieces
The parts of your being
That never were
The missing ingredients
To feed the fire
That no longer burns
It’s hard to live life in this terror
Expecting hell at every turn
To wake up everyday
And expect the worse
To build a façade
And don a mask
To ignore the pain
And hide the hurt
To know that everyday
Is a little slice of hell
Reserved just for Wayne
Every room’s a prison
In its own little way
My only sanctuary
Is the world I fabricate
As this pen bleeds across the page
It etches for eternity
Words I can’t even utter
It’s hard to pick yourself up
And get out of the gutter
When the dirt seems permanent
And makes your heart hurt
Welcome to this glimpse
Of the life I live
Welcome to the projected image
Of the love I give
Its hard to live
And even picture a smile
When no one loves you
It seems like I’ve waited
For a long hard while
I’ve lost count of the days
Its taken to somehow manipulate
The words on the page
To craft them in a manner
As to express
Exactly what I want to say
It seems like my pads run over
With a meaning to everyline
I’ve managed to force out of my pen
Trying to force a poem
Out of a stanza
And I ain’t even got a word
Writers block
Keeps these emotions
Pent up inside
At some point
I must sit back
And enjoy the ride
Brace myself
And hope the life I was living
Never materializes
Into the punishment
I’ve been given
If truth has no alibi
Then why does deception
Infiltrate my mind
Why does reality
Seem like a lie
Why do I wake up everyday
Experiencing terrors
I can’t even say
Haw can a hurt
From so long ago
Constantly relapse
Forcing me to relive the pain
Can I reveal
The mystery that is me
To give you a phantom portrait
Of the depth of me
Could I waste 21 years
Just to end up here
Am I on the brink
Of just another fall
Or clinging to the edge
Of turning this
Jacked up life around
Because despite all my words
Nothing I said was ever heard
My heart breaking
No one listened
Because a broken heart
Never makes a sound
No one cared
Despite the crowd
No one even knew
No one tried to distinguish
The truth
Is it possible
To be able
To salvage my youth
When caught in the midst
Of the war that I’m in
I can’t even look to myself
To find a friend
Because of the war within
All I can do
Is set down my pen
To let you know
That this is THE END

© Wayne Wende

Copyright Â© swiftsouljah ... [ 2005-06-06 00:09:37]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: It's Hard (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 12:19:47 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Dayumm long poem...but good work

Re: It's Hard (User Rating: 1 )
by emystar on Monday, 6th June 2005 @ 12:36:40 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Anyone that writes like you don't need to be quitting.
This is a very powerfull work of art.
One can feel it all in this write.
It'very painfull but it's truth too.
By all means don't give up. U r a great writer.
huggs,
emy

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