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Array ( [sid] => 95693 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => When I'm Kissing You [time] => 2005-05-25 08:41:14 [hometext] => I was torn between love poetry and dedicated poetry, as I wrote this definitely for someone specific, but I landed on love/romantic... comments are not discouraged, but not necessary... [bodytext] => Your eye are things of beauty
Those gorgeous pools of blue
Are even lovely when they're closed
When I'm kissing you.

Your nose won't fit in bottle caps
Like other girls' do
But fits perfectly against my cheek
When I'm kissing you.

Your arms don't hold on with the strength
Of some adhesive glue
But I can't break free from their hold
When I'm kissing you.

You're a beautiful young woman
The others envy you
Yet you become more beautiful
When I'm kissing you. [comments] => 4 [counter] => 193 [topic] => 2 [informant] => sir_odd87 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LovePoetry )

When I'm Kissing You

Contributed by sir_odd87 on Wednesday, 25th May 2005 @ 08:41:14 AM in AEST
Topic: LovePoetry

Your eye are things of beauty
Those gorgeous pools of blue
Are even lovely when they're closed
When I'm kissing you.

Your nose won't fit in bottle caps
Like other girls' do
But fits perfectly against my cheek
When I'm kissing you.

Your arms don't hold on with the strength
Of some adhesive glue
But I can't break free from their hold
When I'm kissing you.

You're a beautiful young woman
The others envy you
Yet you become more beautiful
When I'm kissing you.

Copyright © sir_odd87 ... [ 2005-05-25 08:41:14]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: When I'm Kissing You (User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on Wednesday, 25th May 2005 @ 11:05:48 AM AEST
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This is lovely.

One things stood out to me though, this line:

"Your nose won't fit in bottle caps"

I'm sorry, but it doesn't make sense to me, and puts the poem off. I don't think it fits....

That's the only thing that caught my eye though.

Otherwise, good write.
*hugs* Phil xxx

Re: When I'm Kissing You (User Rating: 1 )
by DorianChambers on Wednesday, 25th May 2005 @ 01:32:49 PM AEST
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Straight from the heart, any attemp 2 express

one's feeling 4 another is comendable, nice

write . . .

Dorian Chambers

Re: When I'm Kissing You (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Wednesday, 25th May 2005 @ 03:55:34 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

DO you think about the good things when you're irate?

Re: When I'm Kissing You (User Rating: 1 )
by JGB on Thursday, 30th March 2006 @ 03:13:16 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I like it. I feel it. The bottle caps bit didn't sound quite right but I do like it.

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