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Array ( [sid] => 9540 [catid] => 1 [aid] => Mick [title] => Self Destruction: Epilogue [time] => 2002-12-31 19:00:00 [hometext] => this is my first attempt at using stream of consciousness. The lines in lowercase are supposed to represent the whispering voice of the gun. [bodytext] => FOUND IN THE END THAT IT WASN’T SO BAD
THE METALLIC TASTE OF THE COLD BLUE STEEL
iamhereyourbackdoorthewaytoescape
VAGUELY REMINISCENT OF BLOOD AND FEAR
THE SAME ONE THAT FOR SO LONG CALLED TO ME
soaraboveandbeyondthemiseryandpain
BECKONING TO ME IN THE COLD RECESSES
THE VERY CORNERS OF MY DARKENED MIND
leavethisbehindandcomewithme
MY ANNIHILATING GODDESS OF SELF DESTRUCTION
EVERY DAY SHE WAS THERE TO REMIND ME
i’lltakeyouawaywe’llflyawayfromthem
SHE WANTS ME AND HER LIES THEY ARE SO SWEET
AS I SQUEEZED HER TRIGGER SHE SAID
comeonkissmei’lltakeawayyourpain
LYING ON THE FLOOR LIKE A MANGLED LOVER
THE SHOCKED LOOK OF BETRAYAL CAPTURED FOREVER
i’vegotyounowforeverletsbetogether
CLUTCHING THE LAST SHARD OF WHAT WAS LOST
THE BROKEN LINK TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD
nowforeverwe'llbetogether

[comments] => 5 [counter] => 323 [topic] => 36 [informant] => Undeadsuperstar [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 14 [ratings] => 3 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => Suicide )

Self Destruction: Epilogue

Contributed by Undeadsuperstar on Tuesday, 31st December 2002 @ 07:00:00 PM in AEST
Topic: Suicide

FOUND IN THE END THAT IT WASN’T SO BAD
THE METALLIC TASTE OF THE COLD BLUE STEEL
iamhereyourbackdoorthewaytoescape
VAGUELY REMINISCENT OF BLOOD AND FEAR
THE SAME ONE THAT FOR SO LONG CALLED TO ME
soaraboveandbeyondthemiseryandpain
BECKONING TO ME IN THE COLD RECESSES
THE VERY CORNERS OF MY DARKENED MIND
leavethisbehindandcomewithme
MY ANNIHILATING GODDESS OF SELF DESTRUCTION
EVERY DAY SHE WAS THERE TO REMIND ME
i’lltakeyouawaywe’llflyawayfromthem
SHE WANTS ME AND HER LIES THEY ARE SO SWEET
AS I SQUEEZED HER TRIGGER SHE SAID
comeonkissmei’lltakeawayyourpain
LYING ON THE FLOOR LIKE A MANGLED LOVER
THE SHOCKED LOOK OF BETRAYAL CAPTURED FOREVER
i’vegotyounowforeverletsbetogether
CLUTCHING THE LAST SHARD OF WHAT WAS LOST
THE BROKEN LINK TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD
nowforeverwe'llbetogether

Copyright Â© Undeadsuperstar ... [ 2002-12-31 19:00:00]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Self Destruction: Epilogue (User Rating: 1 )
by bobotheclown on Tuesday, 31st December 2002 @ 09:49:12 PM AEST
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wow, i liked this a lot. you put so much emotion into this. the line, 'clutching the last shard of what was lost' really struck me. This was amazing way to go I hope to see more of your stuff on here in the future...

Bobo (Joel)

Re: Self Destruction: Epilogue (User Rating: 1 )
by Delusions on Wednesday, 1st January 2003 @ 03:45:16 AM AEST
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Awsome... i really enjoyed reading this one... keep it up.. cant wait to read more
~delusions~

Re: Self Destruction: Epilogue (User Rating: 1 )
by EndEformEtrancE on Wednesday, 1st January 2003 @ 11:09:27 PM AEST
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'AS I SQUEEZED HER TRIGGER SHE SAID
comeonkissmei’lltakeawayyourpain '

Wow. This line blew me away, as did the rest of the poem. I am very, very impressed with this. thankyou so much for sharing this beauty, but one thing - i personally would have appreciated working out that the lowercase was the whispering of the gun, as it is apparent enough, i feel. Sometimes it's nice for a reader to feel they're 'interpreting' something, and perhaps a sign of a good writer is being able to create that feeling, but without giving it away at the start....Just a thought!

Thanks for sharing!

Loads of love

PEACE

Re: Self Destruction: Epilogue (User Rating: 1 )
by OreO on Thursday, 2nd January 2003 @ 04:41:20 AM AEST
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Wow.........just wow .......i cant even tell you anything.......just wow.....
.:*~*:.OreO.:*~*:.

Re: Self Destruction: Epilogue (User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_Kalicharan on Friday, 3rd January 2003 @ 12:01:06 AM AEST
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Great write!!!!
Jenni

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