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Array ( [sid] => 92243 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Capital of Corruption ((edit)) [time] => 2005-04-25 19:54:06 [hometext] => I edited the rythym of the original, and it flows better now. [bodytext] => Sullied earth tainted with claret betrayal
From the savage slaughter amongst sinful beasts

A land of corruption, treason and sin
Give birth to creatures of aberrant ways

Verboten love and sinful pleasures
Lustful minds merged with murderous feats

To live by their own perverse desires
Weak humans are tempt into this abyss

Ravage the restraint placed upon them at birth
Destroying the boundary line that God had preached

Humans restrained by such trivial traits
Gender, class, preconceptions and morals

Once sane beings they lived proper lives
Until corruption finally thrived

Deranged creatures is what they truly are
True aspirations are finally revealed

The women with women, and the men with men
Brothers with sisters, and parents with children

Slaughtering and stealing by their own free will
Till the remnants of sin is what remains
[comments] => 4 [counter] => 1061 [topic] => 13 [informant] => eternalnight4x [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => DarkPoetry )

Capital of Corruption ((edit))

Contributed by eternalnight4x on Monday, 25th April 2005 @ 07:54:06 PM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry

Sullied earth tainted with claret betrayal
From the savage slaughter amongst sinful beasts

A land of corruption, treason and sin
Give birth to creatures of aberrant ways

Verboten love and sinful pleasures
Lustful minds merged with murderous feats

To live by their own perverse desires
Weak humans are tempt into this abyss

Ravage the restraint placed upon them at birth
Destroying the boundary line that God had preached

Humans restrained by such trivial traits
Gender, class, preconceptions and morals

Once sane beings they lived proper lives
Until corruption finally thrived

Deranged creatures is what they truly are
True aspirations are finally revealed

The women with women, and the men with men
Brothers with sisters, and parents with children

Slaughtering and stealing by their own free will
Till the remnants of sin is what remains

Copyright Â© eternalnight4x ... [ 2005-04-25 19:54:06]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Capital of Corruption ((edit)) (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 26th April 2005 @ 03:18:20 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

“Sullied earth tainted with claret betrayal”
-Excellent use of imagery and symbolism

“From the savage slaughter amongst sinful beasts”
-Well expressed alliteration

“A land of corruption, treason and sin
Give birth to creatures of aberrant ways”
-Effective and well articulated personification

“Verboten love and sinful pleasures
Lustful minds merged with murderous feats”
-Eloquent and symbolical.

“To live by their own perverse desires
Weak humans are tempt into this abyss”
-I could not help but smile, when I came across this… It felt much like something I had written, not that long ago…
I feel that we are on the same page!
I couldn’t agree more with you, in regards to this statement.
Many of your concepts seem to overlap with the same concepts in some of your other poems, I, too share that trait and find it difficult to stimulate ideas. Despite this, we are consistent with our works, which isn’t such a bad thing?
I really do enjoy reading your works and look forward to more,
Many more!

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