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Array
(
[sid] => 90866
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Let Me Tell You
[time] => 2005-04-13 18:50:47
[hometext] => If I really did do this, I would have never gotten the second chance with him that has sealed our future for good. I almost didn't have a future.
[bodytext] => Baby, let me tell you something, That I swore I never would. You may wish you never heard it, But I really think you should. Before we were together, Around the time you went away. My eyes were not the blue you love, They were an ugly shade of gray. I lost every single color, In my body, mind, and soul. My love for you was something, I could no longer control. Sometimes I sat on the floor, Sometimes on the bed. Your memory was eating away, At everything in my head. I would barely come out of my room to eat, My parents had no clue, That the only appetite I had, Was a hunger of love from you. I only came out to shower, And also to do my chores. My family was angry with me, Cuz I didn’t care anymore. The little sleep I got, Was invaded with terrible dreams. Stitch by stitch, my heart, Was being ripped apart at the seams. But what I promised I’d never tell you, Baby, it’s really bad. But everyone has a limit, As to how long they can be sad. When I saw knives, I thought of my wrists. I saw windows and thought of glass. Anything to take the pain away, I wanted to be rid of the past. My mind said you weren’t coming back, My heart said wait some more. But the knife I held against my wrist, Promised I’d hurt no more. Several times I tried. But I’d always drop the knife, and cry. Instead of praying for you, I prayed I could curl up and die. Whenever I woke up, I tried to go right back to sleep. When I finally held back all the tears, Your memories made me weep. Whenever I swallowed food, It always made my stomach upset. I thought that if I died, Then I could finally forget. I never really told you, Just how bad it really was. I thought God didn’t listen, But he proved to me he does. If you worry about me now, Think of how much you would back then. I hope I never cry that much, Or pick up a knife again. I just can’t believe how close I came, To taking away my life. Now you know why I never like it, When you always play with your knife. I always knew one day I’d tell you, Just how bad it really was. Nothing compares to my love for you, Trust me, Nothing does. I hope that you’ll thank God, For not letting me do what I wanted to do. Cuz I don’t think I’d be here right now, I also wouldn’t be with you. I Love You, Baby [comments] => 2 [counter] => 168 [topic] => 22 [informant] => JacobsKK [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 40 [ratings] => 8 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LostLove )
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