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Array ( [sid] => 88968 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => You Will Pay [time] => 2005-03-27 17:18:58 [hometext] => Well, it's not very good, certainly not my best, but it DOES rhyme this time, even if it rhymes badly. Please comment, especially critically! [bodytext] => You were my star
Shining in the night
When I was in the dark
You were my light

In every way
I trusted you
And I believed
You would see me through

See, I was afraid
And I was hurt
Mom had cancer
And my heart was burnt

I never saw the people I loved
My family was falling apart
I couldn't stand it anymore
Stone cold was my heart

But then I saw you
You were always there
Funny, clever, kind
Showing me you cared

I trusted you
You became my best friend
But as they say
All good things must end

Love turned to hate
The person I once cared for
Became someone else
And closed the door

You pushed me away
And hurt me more than you know
I don't think you even realized
How much pain you dealt with each blow

The fear I felt then still remains
Your hatred has grown even stronger
I didn't know it was possible
But you despise me, my mentor

No one can help me
You take advantage of me
You ridicule and mock
When I try to fix the way things be

And still I cannot let go
Some days I hate you for what you have done
But most days I miss you
And the way you were once

You are still kind to many
I envy them and cry
Every hug, smile, kindness they receive
Makes me want to scream and die

You do not see what you have done to me
I am ugly to you
But one day you will pay for this
For all the evil you do

You think you are so high and mighty
But in reality
You cannot be so great
If you can hurt an innocent, loving person like me! [comments] => 2 [counter] => 177 [topic] => 22 [informant] => NightOwl [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 4 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => LostLove )
You Will Pay

Contributed by NightOwl on Sunday, 27th March 2005 @ 05:18:58 PM in AEST
Topic: LostLove



You were my star
Shining in the night
When I was in the dark
You were my light

In every way
I trusted you
And I believed
You would see me through

See, I was afraid
And I was hurt
Mom had cancer
And my heart was burnt

I never saw the people I loved
My family was falling apart
I couldn't stand it anymore
Stone cold was my heart

But then I saw you
You were always there
Funny, clever, kind
Showing me you cared

I trusted you
You became my best friend
But as they say
All good things must end

Love turned to hate
The person I once cared for
Became someone else
And closed the door

You pushed me away
And hurt me more than you know
I don't think you even realized
How much pain you dealt with each blow

The fear I felt then still remains
Your hatred has grown even stronger
I didn't know it was possible
But you despise me, my mentor

No one can help me
You take advantage of me
You ridicule and mock
When I try to fix the way things be

And still I cannot let go
Some days I hate you for what you have done
But most days I miss you
And the way you were once

You are still kind to many
I envy them and cry
Every hug, smile, kindness they receive
Makes me want to scream and die

You do not see what you have done to me
I am ugly to you
But one day you will pay for this
For all the evil you do

You think you are so high and mighty
But in reality
You cannot be so great
If you can hurt an innocent, loving person like me!




Copyright © NightOwl ... [ 2005-03-27 17:18:58]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: You Will Pay (User Rating: 1 )
by sicknivesevered on Sunday, 27th March 2005 @ 05:47:47 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Nifty. This was pretty good, just kind of shifty at times. I didn't really like the 9th stanza and the ending seemed out of place; however, the overall impression is good. Nice write. (^_^)v


Re: You Will Pay (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Monday, 28th March 2005 @ 05:39:44 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)
Good write. The last stanza really brought it all together.




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