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leave us to our woe

Contributed by pinksian on Friday, 25th March 2005 @ 05:54:11 PM in AEST
Topic: Suicide



Oh why? Why? Did you have to go? Go and
Leave us here, in our time of woe, you caused
Our woe, and then you left, left us here,

Alone, alone, our memories shine on
You’re gone, still gone, our feelings, burning on,
Oh why? Why? Did you have to go go? Go and

Hurt the innocent babes, who cry, you made
Them cry, and wonder why you are
Our woe? and then you left, left us here,

I know the man who was my father,
Felt that he could leave, there was no after.
Oh why? Why? Did you have to go? Go and

Make it seem, as though every dream, was just
A dream, I couldn’t fulfil; Your dream unreal;
My woe, and then you left, left us here,

You made your decision, there was no revision
Oh why? Why did you have to go? Go and
Leave us to our woe? You left, left us here.




Copyright © pinksian ... [ 2005-03-25 17:54:11]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: leave us to our woe (User Rating: 1 )
by EvaJune on Monday, 25th July 2005 @ 12:14:41 PM AEST
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I´m sorry to hear about your father. You have my condolences.

I have never heard of the villenelle form of writing but I like the style of your poem very much. It reads very well and the words give a sad impression that makes it an impressive poem.

Kizz EvaJune


Re: leave us to our woe (User Rating: 1 )
by Adrianna on Tuesday, 26th July 2005 @ 04:43:55 PM AEST
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Pretty good poem. You just need to hone your craft a little more.


Re: leave us to our woe (User Rating: 1 )
by aprillie on Sunday, 31st July 2005 @ 07:50:35 PM AEST
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the flow is a little off, kinda choppy




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