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Release...

Contributed by FleurdeSang on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 03:38:39 PM in AEST
Topic: DarkPoetry



Once upon a time, I was free…

Misery, my newest love,
Hate; my strength to endure,
Sorrow; these salty streams that descend from mine eyes…

Hope; the dead embers from a once roaring fire,
Happiness; something I’ve lost long ago…
Love; the slowly fading voice that keeps me going,
Lies; this existence I live in…
Silent; these words I weave…
Worthless; I am…

Corrupted; this poor excuse of a mind,
Childhood; where did mine go?
Father; the bringer of my pain…
Death; ever the comforting companion,
Suicide; temptress of my dreams…
Life; a burden I must bear,

Deception; a mask I wear…
Recollections; horrid phantoms of my obscure past…
Reflection; mine laughs at me…
Yesterday; a repetitious song of what will come tomorrow…
Faith; what is there to believe in?
Belief; who is there to trust?

Pen; my source of ‘healthy release,’
Blade; oh, how it pleads for my flesh…
Fear; I might lose this time…
Useless; not worth it to try and heal again…
Voices; they urge me to jump…
Freedom; I fly without wings…
Darkness; The End…







Copyright © FleurdeSang ... [ 2005-03-15 15:38:39]
(Date/Time posted on site)





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Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by fielding88 on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 03:50:33 PM AEST
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Beautiful, just beautiful. i've never seen anybody write in this manner before unless i was reading some old, old book by a poet long dead. this was just plain outstanding, i really liked the weight of the words and it was just great. Everything held some sort of meaning, and it was just superb. I dunno how else to say it, you really delivered an amazing piece here. Excellent job!


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 03:55:37 PM AEST
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Oh Steph!!! Very original format!!!!

You have used it expertly!
Well woven and yet I worry about you. I hope life starts throwing happiness your way!!!!

Again, well done!!


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by b_rand on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 04:12:13 PM AEST
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This really was brilliant. Great job thinking up all those things. I find it interesting that you rate darkness over death when it comes to "the end." Thought provoking!


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by high_on_duct_tape on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 04:14:36 PM AEST
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Wow... this is one of the best depressing poems I have seen, and I read lots of them... this is just amazing. each word has it's own special meaning. I just hope it's not true...


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by helianthus on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 05:05:42 PM AEST
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This was amazing. I am glad to know that I am not the only one who suffered. The pen really did save me. Keep writing. Try not to read what you write too much after you've posted. Once you post you can think of it as venting. Or "Release"...

Thank you. Love your style too. Lis


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by bibi on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 05:34:13 PM AEST
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I really liked this poem. It was so well written and thought out. You have a wonderful way of expressing yourself. Please keep writting I think you have a great talent.


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by Jenni_K on Tuesday, 15th March 2005 @ 09:19:36 PM AEST
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OUTSTANDING!!
Best poem I've read all evening!

Jenni


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by SimplyMe on Wednesday, 16th March 2005 @ 01:24:31 AM AEST
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You have just made it to my list of favorites. This poem was very unique. I loved it. The way you set it up, the way you spoke so freely, and the way you used metaphors. This is one of the best poems i've read tonight. I am looking forward to a lot more of your writes. I have a feeling i will not be disappointed. Wonderful job.

~Alucia~


Re: Release... (User Rating: 1 )
by Nazmythian on Saturday, 26th March 2005 @ 06:38:13 PM AEST
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you forgot Desire ... the need te be heard, to be seen ... to be held ... ignore the voices long enough for Hope to be there to catch you and lend you his wings and carry you above all the rest ... away from the threatening darkness. It will happen ...

Nazmythian ~




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