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Array
(
[sid] => 82607
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => When?
[time] => 2005-02-02 09:33:03
[hometext] => This is just dedicated to my sad life. -_-
[bodytext] =>  When will I stop? When will I cry? When will they come back? Mommy, you don't understand, your always dodge my problems when I try to talk to you. Father, you can listen, but you can't help. I never hear what I want to hear. I never can face my life. I can't see it. Don't know who I am. Don't know who I can be. Sometimes it's good to be invisible when your numb. Sometimes it's hurtful to be in a position you don't want to be in. Where are the tears I'm waiting for? The ones I need to let out. And when I lay my head down on my pillow, I still know that everything's wrong. Nothing's right. It can't be right. Someone stop me please. I need a friend to help me. No one knows my pain, it's all hidden. My friends don't even know. They wouldn't understand. I'm so tired, so gray. I have a life ahead of me. Where will it take me? Which road should I take? And still mommy you don't listen to me, daddy, your advice doesn't help. I can't see it, my face, my light. Don't know who I am. Don't know who I can be. I'm crying inside where I can hide, and strum the strings of my guitar slowly. Which road should I take? Where will it take me? When will I cry? When will I stop? I'm scarred forever. I can't be normal. I can't be perfect. I'm my own little devil. It's so horrid. Everyday I'm falling. I'm deeper into the pain. Deeper into myself because mommy you don't listen, Daddy, your advice doesn't help. I don't know who I am, who I can be. I'm only happy on some days, the best days of my life. I'm all alone, nothing but rubble from the battles I've been fighting. And losing everyone of them. Just put me into myself one last time, and I'll never come out again. I promise. [comments] => 1 [counter] => 209 [topic] => 61 [informant] => xFaLLeNxFaRiex [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 6 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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