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(
[sid] => 76433
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => My Final Words
[time] => 2004-12-19 07:39:49
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] =>
After over 30 years of writing poetry for family, friends, loves and generally anyone who ask me to say that which they could not-
After writing hundreds of poems, 3 books of poetry for publication, over 100 poems for
posting on various internet sites, 8 poems for publication in various books in the past 3 years-
After all of this it has come to my attention (via: a young educated poetic genius who likes to dissect another’s words and emotions) that I lack any poetic style and a general lack of experience for writing verse-
This is from a 20 year old- four years of experiance- educated writter who knows only a few styles of writting...
(After the first two stanzas, i almost thought you were writing a sort of pseudo-pantoum, and i got excited... Then, in the third stanza, you abandoned that approach, as well as the abcb end rhyme and substituted it all with a cool little internal/end rhyme effect in the last line of that stanza. Then, in the fourth stanza, you change it up again and offer the reader an abbc end rhyme scheme, before utterly abandoning all structure during the fifth stanza. I would have really liked to see ONE of the forms carried out through the whole poem. I think that the systematic ways of love are a good topic to be restrained by form, since the couple in the poem is showing no restraint themselves. Overall though, a solid piece. You show maturity as a writer but, somehow, not experience, which may make you the very opposite from my position in life. )
I hope that you all have enjoyed my writing however I will no longer post on this site as I wish not to be in a conflict of words with any who read my poetry-
While I am not afraid of constructive critisism I will not allow others to disect and tear apart my words as they are feelings and will not be changed-
I have my own style of writing as do many of the poets that I read here-
I try to give no advice save this: Always write what you feel not what you think as thoughts change from moment to moment but feelings remain the same for a lifetime-
I will continue to read the poetry here on this site-
Joe
[comments] => 6
[counter] => 249
[topic] => 43
[informant] => hoist1atca
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 0
[ratings] => 0
[editpoem] => 1
[associated] =>
[topicname] => oops
)
My Final Words
Contributed by
hoist1atca
on
Sunday, 19th December 2004 @ 07:39:49 AM in AEST
Topic:
oops
|
After over 30 years of writing poetry for family, friends, loves and generally anyone who ask me to say that which they could not-
After writing hundreds of poems, 3 books of poetry for publication, over 100 poems for
posting on various internet sites, 8 poems for publication in various books in the past 3 years-
After all of this it has come to my attention (via: a young educated poetic genius who likes to dissect another’s words and emotions) that I lack any poetic style and a general lack of experience for writing verse-
This is from a 20 year old- four years of experiance- educated writter who knows only a few styles of writting...
(After the first two stanzas, i almost thought you were writing a sort of pseudo-pantoum, and i got excited... Then, in the third stanza, you abandoned that approach, as well as the abcb end rhyme and substituted it all with a cool little internal/end rhyme effect in the last line of that stanza. Then, in the fourth stanza, you change it up again and offer the reader an abbc end rhyme scheme, before utterly abandoning all structure during the fifth stanza. I would have really liked to see ONE of the forms carried out through the whole poem. I think that the systematic ways of love are a good topic to be restrained by form, since the couple in the poem is showing no restraint themselves. Overall though, a solid piece. You show maturity as a writer but, somehow, not experience, which may make you the very opposite from my position in life. )
I hope that you all have enjoyed my writing however I will no longer post on this site as I wish not to be in a conflict of words with any who read my poetry-
While I am not afraid of constructive critisism I will not allow others to disect and tear apart my words as they are feelings and will not be changed-
I have my own style of writing as do many of the poets that I read here-
I try to give no advice save this: Always write what you feel not what you think as thoughts change from moment to moment but feelings remain the same for a lifetime-
I will continue to read the poetry here on this site-
Joe
Copyright ©
hoist1atca
... [
2004-12-19 07:39:49]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
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Re: My Final Words
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Sunday, 19th December 2004 @ 08:49:46 AM AEST
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a Message)
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It is my opinion that some people, regardless of ability, are just full of themselves. I also think there are many who fail to recognize that poetry is an individual thing; we all have our favorites and just because ^we^ don't like a poet, does not mean they are not good. The inability of recent generations of people to be good audiences has a lot to do with the general lack of civility in society.
Nevertheless, if you have touched even -one- person (and I can guarantee you have touched one person at a fairly critical time) your duty as poet is worth fulfilling. I know of whom you are speaking and generally find that person's comments to be very rude and uncouth. Someone who adheres to the letter, but not the *spirit* of their education. Don't bandy words with this person, don't even allow them the satisfaction. Delete the poem they commented on and repost it. Chances are they happened upon it by accident and are just try to sound superior. Don't deny the rest of us the (rare) pleasure, just because someone is immature for their age.
Thanks, and hugs. |
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Re: My Final Words
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Sunday, 19th December 2004 @ 11:13:04 AM AEST
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Please, do not leave.
I am not sure if I have read any of your poetry (There are so many poets here) But I agree with Timebot. I can bet that you have touched the hearts of many people here.
Also, I agree that you should be able to write how you feel without someone attacking it.
Please. Give us all one more chance. There are some bad apples here, but the rest of us appreciate feelings and people.
Much love,
*hugs* Phil xxx |
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Re: My Final Words
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Sunday, 19th December 2004 @ 11:26:36 AM AEST
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a Message)
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opinions are like arseholes and everyone has got them, I try to ingore the people on here that get on my nerves as they just aren't worth my time or energy entertaining them, I wish you weren't leaving, hope you will come back soon *hugs*
pixie xx |
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Re: My Final Words
(User Rating: 1 )
by autumngreeneyes on
Monday, 20th December 2004 @ 12:05:43 AM AEST
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a Message)
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ya know..people are tired. It's that time of year. I know you commented on a work of mine at a critical time..I have very few friends on this site..but I don't really care. The few I have mean a lot. The ones I don't have seem jealous and catty.. likely young. Whatever..lacking in experience for some reason, and empathy.. I too am published, I have three awards under my ample belt, I am best new poet of both years 2002 and 2003.. I was invited to share my poetry at the University of Rome.. which I did.. My books are not self published.. nor anthologies.. but real books by major publishers. Found in Barnes and Noble, and other book stores and libraries and The Library of Congress. I don't usually tell people..it's not an issue. But your comment warmed my heart as did Jecks when I was getting almost no comments at all. My work isn't as good as some, but it is better than a lot.. and deserving of a lot more comments than it gets.. I ask you to please stay and hang in with me. I am in great pain..and if not for friends like you, and Rita..KatyQueen..lostinmyself..I could not do it.. I ran away before and my problems went with me.
There is a Clique here..that's for sure..it needs to go. Or change its ways for sure.. and stop circling the wagons.. |
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Re: My Final Words
(User Rating: 1 )
by katyqueen35 on
Monday, 20th December 2004 @ 12:24:00 AM AEST
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a Message)
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| Nooooooooooo Rita don't leave......... |
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Re: My Final Words
(User Rating: 1 )
by Former_Member on
Tuesday, 21st December 2004 @ 06:27:33 PM AEST
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a Message)
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Joe~
I understand and respect your decision to go if that is your wish.
But I beg you to please reconsider your viewpoint and look
at the wonderful comments vs. the bad ones. Just look at all the
great people who have posted on this one alone. You are
well respected and admired. You have a gift and it would be
a shame if you were to take it elsewhere. I agree with Timebot and Lost.
If you must leave, then you must, but you will be dearly missed.
By MANY. Your comments, thoughts and friendship have meant
the world to me. Especially the past couple weeks. You have
become a great friend.
Thanks Joe!
~Breezy |
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