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Array
(
[sid] => 75280
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Metal Heart
[time] => 2004-12-11 02:24:03
[hometext] => Wrote this aw h il e ago as a journal entry on my site...i think most honest thing I have ever written...because it's honest i cant officially call it lame...ya know?
[bodytext] => The world tries to reach me to communicate with me at least for a second before I storm out into the limelight of some other pain-receiving human punch bag I want to talk about how unreliable and cryptic my existence is for anyone but myself me myself when I am lonely I start cranking up the guilt like a passionate chainsaw cutting through my wooden cold wet heart the lonely silence inside my head is loud with *****y accusations maybe they are all right I come and go family and friends good ***** good conversation thirst for amusement on the expense of the people that burn with sincerity through trying to be a special whore I have become the grave no one visits because it screams at the dead: “where are the ***** candles you heartless zombies!” this putrid sore gas filled hole will never fill with sweet ocean water I will vandalize myself with memories like nails dug into a raw skin disease a blue abandoned narcissist with a one track mind body loved and mind penetrated I am strung out on the pain of others I had caused I exploit my crystal tongue until it breaks in their eyes in the eyes of their hearts little red umbrella taped to the next page looks like a swollen blood clog I drink the poison drink biting my lip until the tissue is torn and bleeding I hit my fist against my metal heart (the ending a bit Godzilla-like) [comments] => 3 [counter] => 241 [topic] => 43 [informant] => ina [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => oops )
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