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Array ( [sid] => 75142 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => just a moment longer..... [time] => 2004-12-10 04:23:39 [hometext] => i just wrote this tonight....it usually takes me much longer to write...tell me what you think.. [bodytext] => if you listen.....
just a little closer
and if you would stay.....
just a moment longer
You might be able to hear
these drops of regret
fall into the bucket
And you might be able to see
these drops of sweet "sorry"
filling up the bottle

I told myself this is
no fault of my own
and blamed it on your fear
of being alone

but if I bring you.....
just a little closer
and if I could hold you.....
just a moment longer
I might be able to take back
those drops of regret
and empty that bucket
And I might be able to soak up
those drops of sweet "sorry"
and break open that bottle

We made this fairy tale
into a very short story
You deserved a much better ending
and for this.....
I am very very sorry..... [comments] => 6 [counter] => 300 [topic] => 22 [informant] => justjonesy [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => LostLove )

just a moment longer.....

Contributed by justjonesy on Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 04:23:39 AM in AEST
Topic: LostLove

if you listen.....
just a little closer
and if you would stay.....
just a moment longer
You might be able to hear
these drops of regret
fall into the bucket
And you might be able to see
these drops of sweet "sorry"
filling up the bottle

I told myself this is
no fault of my own
and blamed it on your fear
of being alone

but if I bring you.....
just a little closer
and if I could hold you.....
just a moment longer
I might be able to take back
those drops of regret
and empty that bucket
And I might be able to soak up
those drops of sweet "sorry"
and break open that bottle

We made this fairy tale
into a very short story
You deserved a much better ending
and for this.....
I am very very sorry.....

Copyright © justjonesy ... [ 2004-12-10 04:23:39]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: just a moment longer..... (User Rating: 1 )
by Kindredblood_dragon on Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 04:29:40 AM AEST
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Beautifully tender and composed with such compassion and feeling...awesome poem.

Re: just a moment longer..... (User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 05:11:36 AM AEST
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sad and a very deep write,you defenatly write from the heart,

pixie xx

Re: just a moment longer..... (User Rating: 1 )
by girish on Friday, 10th December 2004 @ 05:54:09 AM AEST
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very good write
girish

Re: just a moment longer..... (User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on Saturday, 11th December 2004 @ 12:43:47 AM AEST
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I really enjoyed this one, and read it a few times. A plaintive, regretful poem but one written so well that it is not overly bitter or maudlin. Most excellent.

Spike

Re: just a moment longer..... (User Rating: 1 )
by Jenn2004 on Saturday, 11th December 2004 @ 08:41:29 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Beautiful Poem, thanks for commenting on mine!!!

Re: just a moment longer..... (User Rating: 1 )
by girltranscended on Saturday, 16th April 2005 @ 02:01:54 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

We made this fairy tale
into a very short story
You deserved a much better ending
and for this.....
I am very very sorry.....

Anyone who relates to this- must just deeply ache here, an inner understanding, the unspoken regret we carry and live with like an old memory (that will never fade) that we only take out once in awhile.
Another great write!
:)

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