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Array
(
[sid] => 74101
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => I'm Sorry
[time] => 2004-12-02 11:46:29
[hometext] => It's pretty long.it's not a poem, but it's a story...but it is okay....leave a comment if you want...
[bodytext] => She's not the same as she use to be. Use to be so happy, and lively...but along the way it seems she died from the pain. She started to cut, then moved to pills, and now she's shooting. Since her boyfriend is a drug dealer she gets good deals. With enough heroin to knock her out for days. With her pleeding eyes, her boyfriend doesn't object. In fact she even has him give it to her most of the time... She would overdose on it otherwise. He hides it so she can't find it, and so she wont overdose; when she's on her "trip." She lays around half dead, when he leaves for work she's there on the couch....lying in the darkness, and when he comes home she's still laying there in the darkness. He turned on the lights, she didn't flench, threw his things on to the floor. Turned on the t.v. and went to the kitchen, and asked her what she wanted to eat, she staired at the t.v. blindlessly. He turned off the kitche light and sat beside her. He pulled her into his lap, and wrapped his arms around her. He moved her hair back out of her face, and kissed her forehead softly... She was asleep,but he still sat there with her for an hour or so...just brushing his fingers lightly across her forehead. He stood up, picking her up in his arms....he carried her into the bedroom, and placed her lightly on the bed. Then he got undressed then laid beside her, again brushing her hair out of her eyes. He kissed her forehead again, and whispered " I love you." Then he fell asleep with her in his arms. He woke up...and looked around the room for her. But she wasn't there, he sighed then went to the bathroom. He knocked on the door....then heard things fall. He tried the knob...but it was locked; he said "Hunny, what are you doing?" She didn't answer. So he hit the door, trying to push it open, he said again..."What are you doing? Answer me damn it!"; she still didn't reply. He kicked the door in, she was on her knees, on the floor. Shaking as she injected some more heroin. He grabbed her hands, and tore the needle out of her arm...it started to bleed. She didn't try to stop it, the heroin had already started to take it's effect. He got on his knees and started to cry in her lap... "Why are you doing this baby? Why? You promised me you would stop! Promised that was your last time....YOU PROMISED!!" He cried harder as her blood fell on his skin. He put his hand over the wound, squeezing tightly, almost turning her arm colors. He cried harder, as the blood seeped through his fingers and on to the floor. She pushed him away, pulling her arm from his grip. She stood up and stumbled to the door way, she turned and look at him, with blood still falling from her arm, she whispered "I'm sorry." then fell to the floor. He jumped up, and ran to her...she wasn't breathing, he started to panic. He tore his shirt and wrapped it around her arm. He picked her up into her arms, and ran to the car, gently laid her in there. And drove to the hospital, as fast as he could. He grabbed her again picking her up in his arms, he ran into the emergency room, screaming for help. A nurse came running, and asked what was wrong, he screamed at her "SHE'S NOT BREATHING!! AND SHE WON'T STOP BLEEDING! The nurse ran and got some doctors, they came running back with a bed. They took her away...they came right back and asked, "What happened?, why is she bleeding?" He replied in a shaking voice "She took heroin, and I ripped the needle from her arm, she fell over and wasn't breathing! Do something for her please?! Do something damn it!" They went back, and din't come out again for a few hours. Then ginally one doctor came out, he took off his bloody gloves, and looked at the ground and sighed, he looked back then said..."I'm sorry....we....she wasn't strong enough....." He studdered as he said "Can I see her?" The doctor said "yes.", then took him to the room, and left. He staired at her for a few minutes, then slowly walked towards her bed. He brushed her hair from her face, then kissed her forehead softly, and whispered "I love you." one last time. He shut the door, and went home... Nothing was right, when he opened the door, she wasn't, laying there for him to pick her up, and place in bed, she wasn't there to kiss or hug. He walked past the bathroom and looked in the blood was still on the floor, with the bottle, and needles. He got undressed then laid in bed. He tossed and turned all night....he could still smell her...taste her....see her beautiful brown hair, her goregous hazel eyes....her soft pale skin, and her pink lips.. He couln't take it, so he got out of bed, and went to the bathroom he sat on the floor and looked around...he picked up the bottle of heroin....then one of the needles....he pushed it into his arm....injected it.....then filled the needle up again....pushed it in...and didn't quit He laid on the floor, and closed his eyes, waiting to die.... [comments] => 2 [counter] => 242 [topic] => 66 [informant] => addicted2selfharm [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 10 [ratings] => 2 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => drugabuse )
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