|
 Menu
|
|
|
|
|
Social
|
|
|
|
|
Array
(
[sid] => 72696
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
[time] => 2004-11-22 14:51:16
[hometext] => A continuation of a story ... this would be the eleventh part
[bodytext] => ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From Blood Flower: Deceptions ... ( part 10 )
I sensed a somewhat familiar change in her
Just before she buried her teeth into my neck
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shock at first, evolved into anger unbridled
And I turned, then I turned on her
My hand shot to her throat
And I raised her up off of me
I raised her up off of the floor
I raised her up into the air
And I hurled her across the room
Watching as she flew
Watching as she tumbled and spun
High above the bed
Watching as she slammed into the wall
Then fell down onto the night table that
Collapsed beneath the sudden added weight
An oil lamp, which had been burning atop it
Shattered upon the floor
The flaming wick, mercifully extinguished
Smothered and drowned by flowing oil
She rose amidst the rubble
Arguably less attractive
Than a few scant moments prior
She spat my blood upon the floor in disgust
Before bending to retrieve a broken leg
From the now defunct table
Moving in unison, as if in some macabre dance
We lunged towards each other
Meeting in the air, our bodies collided
We crashed down upon the bed
Her impromptu steak slid past my guard
And found its way through my tunic
The jagged tip pierced my flesh
Intense pain erupted within me
As the splintered shaft drove deeper
I felt it tear muscle and sinew
It came to rest against bone
Inside and just below my left shoulder
I howled in pain and rage as I drew it out
I backhanded her hard across the face
Using the offensive stick
She reeled and fell, sprawling backwards
I pounced upon her
Pinning her left arm beneath my knee
I raised the makeshift weapon
Preparing to strike, I took aim
Her right hand thrust out towards me
Her thumb entered the hole in my chest
That the table leg had vacated
The world spun at an odd angle
I heard the steak clatter to the floor
Reaching across my chest
With my right hand I clutched at her wrist
My left arm dangled useless at the moment
I pulled hard as we grappled
My skin burned as the burrowing thumb
Alternated between sliding out
And digging further into me
With a shout and a moment of extreme effort
I extricated the foreign digit
From the folds of my flesh
A multitude of sharp snaps and cracks
Accompanied her wail of pain
As I folded her wrist backwards upon itself
She drew a ragged breath between her teeth
Then she opened her mouth as if to speak
My head imploded and the voice I heard
Reverberating within my skull
Though decidedly feminine, was not hers
My vision evaporated into a field of white
Burning light appeared from behind my own eyes
Generated from some secret place in my mind
The voice was discord and dissonance
A thousand fingernails breaking
Raking down the length of a large blackboard
I was losing consciousness and collapsing
Falling, sinking, tumbling down upon the linen
Commanded by a being that was not there
With a voice that screamed ...
STOP ! You WILL NOT do this !!
[comments] => 11
[counter] => 289
[topic] => 13
[informant] => Nazmythian
[notes] =>
[ihome] => 0
[alanguage] => english
[acomm] => 0
[haspoll] => 0
[pollID] => 0
[score] => 25
[ratings] => 5
[editpoem] => 0
[associated] =>
[topicname] => DarkPoetry
)
Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
Contributed by
Nazmythian
on
Monday, 22nd November 2004 @ 02:51:16 PM in AEST
Topic:
DarkPoetry
|
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From Blood Flower: Deceptions ... ( part 10 )
I sensed a somewhat familiar change in her
Just before she buried her teeth into my neck
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Shock at first, evolved into anger unbridled
And I turned, then I turned on her
My hand shot to her throat
And I raised her up off of me
I raised her up off of the floor
I raised her up into the air
And I hurled her across the room
Watching as she flew
Watching as she tumbled and spun
High above the bed
Watching as she slammed into the wall
Then fell down onto the night table that
Collapsed beneath the sudden added weight
An oil lamp, which had been burning atop it
Shattered upon the floor
The flaming wick, mercifully extinguished
Smothered and drowned by flowing oil
She rose amidst the rubble
Arguably less attractive
Than a few scant moments prior
She spat my blood upon the floor in disgust
Before bending to retrieve a broken leg
From the now defunct table
Moving in unison, as if in some macabre dance
We lunged towards each other
Meeting in the air, our bodies collided
We crashed down upon the bed
Her impromptu steak slid past my guard
And found its way through my tunic
The jagged tip pierced my flesh
Intense pain erupted within me
As the splintered shaft drove deeper
I felt it tear muscle and sinew
It came to rest against bone
Inside and just below my left shoulder
I howled in pain and rage as I drew it out
I backhanded her hard across the face
Using the offensive stick
She reeled and fell, sprawling backwards
I pounced upon her
Pinning her left arm beneath my knee
I raised the makeshift weapon
Preparing to strike, I took aim
Her right hand thrust out towards me
Her thumb entered the hole in my chest
That the table leg had vacated
The world spun at an odd angle
I heard the steak clatter to the floor
Reaching across my chest
With my right hand I clutched at her wrist
My left arm dangled useless at the moment
I pulled hard as we grappled
My skin burned as the burrowing thumb
Alternated between sliding out
And digging further into me
With a shout and a moment of extreme effort
I extricated the foreign digit
From the folds of my flesh
A multitude of sharp snaps and cracks
Accompanied her wail of pain
As I folded her wrist backwards upon itself
She drew a ragged breath between her teeth
Then she opened her mouth as if to speak
My head imploded and the voice I heard
Reverberating within my skull
Though decidedly feminine, was not hers
My vision evaporated into a field of white
Burning light appeared from behind my own eyes
Generated from some secret place in my mind
The voice was discord and dissonance
A thousand fingernails breaking
Raking down the length of a large blackboard
I was losing consciousness and collapsing
Falling, sinking, tumbling down upon the linen
Commanded by a being that was not there
With a voice that screamed ...
STOP ! You WILL NOT do this !!
Copyright ©
Nazmythian
... [
2004-11-22 14:51:16]
(Date/Time posted on
site)
Advertisments:
|
|
|
|
|
|
Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more
|
|
All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry
Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any
comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please
contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title
etc.
|
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by pixie on
Monday, 22nd November 2004 @ 02:52:12 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
ooh excellent, a brilliant write Scott *hugs*
pixie xx
|
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by FleurdeSang on
Monday, 22nd November 2004 @ 03:12:44 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
*Shivers...* Such intense power! I saw everything, heard everything, felt everything, as if it were I he struck, as if it were I that shrieked those powerful words... Incredible! Absolutely flawless! The ruthless anger, the demand for dominance... You had my full attention, even when I wanted to look away...
A beautiful, yet disturbing tale, dear Scott. You weave them so well! A deliciously morbid dance, frighteningly real, and so violent! But I still love it. Encore and roses! Another exquisite story Anna has whispered to you, cheri Scott. I thank you for sharing. Much love! And can't wait for the twelfth piece! Forever,
Fleur de Bonheur |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by Willofree on
Monday, 22nd November 2004 @ 05:45:30 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Naz, Again a spell binding and very powerful write. I really get drawn into the story.
Great work, you ought to write a novel.
I really enjoy reading your work.
Willofree |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by Stitch on
Monday, 22nd November 2004 @ 06:25:27 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
What are you doing mucking about on this site?
This is incredible.
You, my friend are a consummate and professional storyteller.
I will be proud some day when you are a
published hot shot (if you aren't already)
to say "I knew you when."
Stitch
(who can't wait for the next installment) |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by theMoth on
Monday, 22nd November 2004 @ 07:05:32 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Glad you are back on this stuff.
And doing an excellent job.
Keeping it interesting.
Keep going!
--Mothy |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by Spike on
Monday, 22nd November 2004 @ 09:51:04 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
I was enthralled from started to finish! gripping, poetic, accessible. I can't wait to the next instalment!
Spike |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by Cesaria1 on
Tuesday, 23rd November 2004 @ 11:10:31 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| wow, what a nightmare! |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by autumngreeneyes on
Monday, 29th November 2004 @ 09:11:29 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
| gosh this is good!!! we should talk.. |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by arden on
Friday, 3rd December 2004 @ 01:06:22 PM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
well hell naz i agree fully with stitchy.
this.... ya know i dont have words for it.
its unbelievible.
awesomely done man.
Loved this.
Becky |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by lostinmyself on
Monday, 20th December 2004 @ 09:56:31 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
O_o I thought I had commented on this... Guess not.
Well Scotty, I gotta agree with Stitchy, It's an honour to know such a fantastic storyteller and poet.
*wants a signed book* ;) lol
Nah, I'm serious.
I think this is really good. Not as good as some, I don't think this tells quite as well as some of them. It's still great though. lol.
*wills you to write more* lol ;)
*hugs* Phil xxx |
|
|
Re: Blood Flower: 11 - Petulance
(User Rating: 1 )
by TaintedSoul on
Wednesday, 5th January 2005 @ 11:32:14 AM AEST
(User
Info | Send
a Message)
|
Very intense moment in the storyline ... enjoyed the fight! Very descriptive.
peace
TS |
|
|
|
· 
Poetry
Community
Members
Areas
Reference
Search
Top
Others
