Your Poetry Dot Com

Welcome to Your Poetry Dot Com - Read, Rate, Comment on, or Submit Poetry. Browse Poetry Forums, or just enjoy other parts of our poetic community.
One of the largest databases of poetry on the net, now over 198,500+ poems!

Poems On Site: 198,500+ Comments On Poems: 427,000+ Forum Posts: 105,000+

Custom Search


Welcome !	Home · FAQ · Topics · Web Links · Your Account · Submit Poetry · Top 30 · OldSite Link	29-May 17:17:27 AEST

Menu

· Our eBay Store

· Error Submit

Poetry

· Submit Poetry

· Least Read Poems

· Members Listing

· Old Site Post 2001

· Old Site Pre 2001

· Poetry Archive

· Public Domain Poetry

Stories

· Stories (NEW ! )

· Submit Story

· Story Topics

· Stories Archive

· Story Search

Community

· Our Poetry Forums

· Our Arcade
100's of Games !

Site Help

· FAQ

· Feedback

Members Areas

· Your Account

· Members Journals

· Premium Sign-Up

Premium Section

· Special Section

· Premium Poems

· Premium Submit

· Premium Search

· Premium Archive

· Premium Topics

Fun & Games

· Jokes

· Bubble Puzzle

· Cross Word Easy

· Word Hunt

Reference

· Dictionary (Rhyming)

· Site Updates

· Special Content

Search

Top

Help This Site

· Donations

Others

· Moderators

Our Other Sites

· Embroidery Design Store
· Your Jokes
· Special Urls
· JM Embroideries
· Public Domain Poetry and Stories
· Diamond Dotz
· Cooking Info and Recipes
· Quoof - Australian Story

Social

Array ( [sid] => 70060 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Disguises [time] => 2004-11-03 21:00:32 [hometext] => Wrote this in about 2 minutes Tuesday morning...needs work... comments appreciated [bodytext] => Disguises are unraveling.
One less perfect,
Less convincing
Than the last.
I'm becoming less and less
Of what you want.
What you've expected,
Wished,
What you've forced upon me.
This burden you won't allow me
To be rid of.
You're fading from within me.
For once
Maybe, just maybe,
I can enjoy
Being me
Rather than what you've made me. [comments] => 5 [counter] => 189 [topic] => 43 [informant] => xXAgainTwiceXx [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => oops )

Disguises

Contributed by xXAgainTwiceXx on Wednesday, 3rd November 2004 @ 09:00:32 PM in AEST
Topic: oops

Disguises are unraveling.
One less perfect,
Less convincing
Than the last.
I'm becoming less and less
Of what you want.
What you've expected,
Wished,
What you've forced upon me.
This burden you won't allow me
To be rid of.
You're fading from within me.
For once
Maybe, just maybe,
I can enjoy
Being me
Rather than what you've made me.

Copyright © xXAgainTwiceXx ... [ 2004-11-03 21:00:32]
(Date/Time posted on site)

Advertisments:

Previous Posted Poem | | Next Posted Poem

Sorry, comments are no longer allowed for anonymous, please register for a free membership to access this feature and more

All comments are owned by the poster. Your Poetry Dot Com is not responsible for the content of any comment.
That said, if you find an offensive comment, please contact via the FeedBack Form with details, including poem title etc.

Re: Disguises (User Rating: 1 )
by eyesxcriedxout1989 on Wednesday, 3rd November 2004 @ 09:08:05 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

as I've said before I liked it...very good job

Mason

P.S. what the hell does "ly2" mean?

Re: Disguises (User Rating: 1 )
by girltranscended on Wednesday, 3rd November 2004 @ 09:57:04 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I like this. Just a note: after the first four lines my ear wants to hear it rhyme, maybe like:
Disguises are unraveling,one less perfect, less convincing than the last.
I'm becoming less and less of what you expected in the past. and then maybe rhyme it one more time...or not even really rhyme it but throw in a couple well placed similar sounding words for flow.
Great job!

Re: Disguises (User Rating: 1 )
by Tanmaya on Thursday, 4th November 2004 @ 09:01:10 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Very well-written.
Concise and yet, meaningful.

Re: Disguises (User Rating: 1 )
by Stoney1 on Thursday, 4th November 2004 @ 12:43:46 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

I think you have an interesting idea here,
and I think that you should develop it.

You could start with a good edit. Less use of
the word, "less" would be a place to begin. *g*

Stoney

Re: Disguises (User Rating: 1 )
by screwup on Saturday, 13th November 2004 @ 11:17:08 AM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

great piece... as i feel the same... and i can understand your pain.
~screwup

While every care is taken to ensure the general sites content is family safe, our moderators cannot be in all places; all the time. Please report poetry and or comments that are in breach of our site rules HERE (Please include poem title or url). Parents also please ensure that you supervise your children well when they are on the internet; regardless of what a site says about being, or being considered, child-safe.

Poetry is much like a great photo, a single "moment in time" capturing many feelings and emotions. Yet, they are very alive; creating stirrings within the readers who form visual "pictures" of the expressed emotions within the Poem. ©

Opinions expressed in the poetry, comments, forums etc. on this site are not necessarily those of this site, its owners and/or operators; but of the individuals who post items to this site.
Frequently Asked Questions | | | Privacy Policy | | | Contact Webmaster

All submitted items are Copyright © to their submitter. All the rest Copyright © 2002-2050 by Your Poetry Dot Com

All logos and trademarks in this site are property of their respective owners.

Script Generation Time: 0.052 Seconds. - View our Site Map | .© your-poetry.com