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Array
(
[sid] => 68731
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => Cutting
[time] => 2004-10-24 21:13:22
[hometext] =>
[bodytext] => distant lonely angry and upset longing to cut to rip to slice at my skin let it all out let the pain flow watch the blood trickle red crimson slowely moves such a simple thing containing all the pain in one small drop of my being and the longing for that feeling starts to take control pushing out all the sanity all that i use to control suddenly im just watching as my body moves on its own clutching at the thing i am to become i try to come back to stop gain self control but the pain is too strong it keeps me where i am as my hand takes the knife i've lost all control i'm gone from myself drifting to a place only i know i feel a twinge a sting and some pain the release is greater than all the pain and slowely i drift back begin to take control i open my eyes and the tears start to flow all i can see now is the new pain i have caused and my world comes crashing down forget all the self control i watch the blood fall wonderment in my eyes everything starts slipping away right before my eyes red crimson slowely moves such a simple thing containing all the pain in one small drop of my being this takes it all away but in the end causes more pain and night after night this cycle takes a hold i'm losing myself along with my self control in this mix of emotions i now call home [comments] => 3 [counter] => 181 [topic] => 48 [informant] => Jamals_babie_gurl_69 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 4 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => EmotionalPoetry )
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