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Array
(
[sid] => 66816
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => breathe
[time] => 2004-10-10 08:50:59
[hometext] => It is choppy and messy because that is how this life is...
[bodytext] => Its hard to wake up not knowing. then suddenly remebering who you are. Awe struck with the realization of your reality: No more coffee shops and trips to the mall, prom shoe shopping at a quarter past three I got to hurry and get to work! none of the fast cash stops on the corner for a quick fix me up some scambled eggs with cheese cuz thats all I know how to make love to me secretly with butterflies in my stomach waiting to be set free by you, my savior my answer to all that was hurting me. but you created my demon, a poison to soak through my skin like my deep fortifying conditioner on my hair that's been dyed as many times as you've lied... But we still watch tv and act like we're kids. But we still pretend its fun to do what we used to. We push our luck, milking childhood memories of how to be happy untill they are swollen and scaly and dried up. We try to take water from stones but end up throwing them at each other. Breathe. I don't know how to do what I used to do to make me happy without you! I try and I lie to myself and wish I could die and I just wonder why... Things used to come so naturally and we used to value loyalty and our sanity. Now we rehearse what we will say in a certain way to make sure we ruin each others day. NOTHING IS PURE ANY MORE but we are still at it looking for a cure for this misery. So lets do what we do every night in this life... fall asleep in each others arms stitched together with threads of pain and we can we wake up in the morning to the reality again. [comments] => 3 [counter] => 153 [topic] => 60 [informant] => Rxqueen [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 0 [ratings] => 0 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => insomniac )
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