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Array ( [sid] => 60059 [catid] => 1 [aid] => mick [title] => Sixteen No More [time] => 2004-08-13 21:55:12 [hometext] => [please don't look at this as only a rape poem...its much more then that] [bodytext] => I'm standing in a darkened alley
a .35 cleansing my right ear
I'm suddenly sure it's the finale
but I'm unable to shed a tear

I close my eyes and hope for the best
while he rips and claws at my soul;
my lips are invaded, my body depressed;
my mind spins out of control

I hate you, I loathe you, I want you to die
are the words I think but don’t say
all that comes out is a high, strangled cry
when he rises and creeps away

I slowly get up and make my way home
feeling used, defiled, and unclean
nowhere to go and nowhere to roam
abruptly older then my sixteen [comments] => 5 [counter] => 141 [topic] => 32 [informant] => lp15 [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 18 [ratings] => 4 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => SadPoetry )

Sixteen No More

Contributed by lp15 on Friday, 13th August 2004 @ 09:55:12 PM in AEST
Topic: SadPoetry

I'm standing in a darkened alley
a .35 cleansing my right ear
I'm suddenly sure it's the finale
but I'm unable to shed a tear

I close my eyes and hope for the best
while he rips and claws at my soul;
my lips are invaded, my body depressed;
my mind spins out of control

I hate you, I loathe you, I want you to die
are the words I think but don’t say
all that comes out is a high, strangled cry
when he rises and creeps away

I slowly get up and make my way home
feeling used, defiled, and unclean
nowhere to go and nowhere to roam
abruptly older then my sixteen

Copyright Â© lp15 ... [ 2004-08-13 21:55:12]
(Date/Time posted on site)

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Re: Sixteen No More (User Rating: 1 )
by lp15 on Friday, 13th August 2004 @ 10:03:37 PM AEST
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like i said before, after you read i would love for you to comment and tell me what you really think...good or bad. im always up for ways i can improve. also, this isnt just a rape poem, though it may seem that way on the surface. look past all that and try to get the deeper message. thanks for reading!

Re: Sixteen No More (User Rating: 1 )
by Bohemian_with_a_pen on Friday, 13th August 2004 @ 10:13:04 PM AEST
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this is awesome, u have such great talent

Re: Sixteen No More (User Rating: 1 )
by ps_ihateyou on Friday, 13th August 2004 @ 10:15:34 PM AEST
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i really liked this. it really made me think. nice job. keep up the good work.

Re: Sixteen No More (User Rating: 1 )
by Stellar on Friday, 13th August 2004 @ 10:53:08 PM AEST
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I think this is very well written. The words flow and depict the emotions perfectly. I wouldn't change a thing.

Re: Sixteen No More (User Rating: 1 )
by CaddishCut on Friday, 13th August 2004 @ 11:01:17 PM AEST
(User Info | Send a Message)

Wow. That really good! Sad, but good. Sorrow and anger filled poems make the best ones.

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