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Array
(
[sid] => 58118
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => cerebral interloper
[time] => 2004-07-29 22:20:25
[hometext] => i don't know if it's psychotic, suicide, dark, lost love, or if it's any of these at all. maybe it's all of them.
[bodytext] => (cerebral interloper) her hair always covers her face (I’ve never seen her eyes) she whispers from behind that veil of silk and her secrets embrace me running soft across my body like the warm breath of a sigh and her secrets defile me drawing blood and other fluids leaving scars I’ll always cherish tearing at my mind with iron claws and her secrets leave me hollow feeling like a piece of me has died like my very soul was raped like cold dawn will never come for she is the night and she will never leave she loved to mutter (born dead) forgotten thoughts and second hand dreams all the while, slowly dancing careful not to tread on the shadow she cast her sharp curves tearing holes in existence (her body was a work of abstract art) reciting her poetry to me as I cut myself bled myself letting the tiny drops of me fall upon her bare feet rubbing in the red like a sacred oil and as we made our loveless love on damp earth and fallen leaves she would tell me of her suicide attempt within the womb wrapping the umbilical cord around her neck only to be foiled by a nosy doctor she would recall vivid dreams of death and the smell of colors I’ve never known (I’ve never seen her eyes I never saw her face) I don't know when she stopped being real if she was ever real at all I only know that she was a ghost when she began to stab me she did it softly resting the point of the knife on my chest pressing ever so gently until the tip broke the skin and slowly sank inside me seven holes she left in my chest before placing the blade over my heart and I lay still accepting her choice struggling for air with punctured lungs knowing that I was near death I reached up to brush her hair aside to gaze into her eyes once before I died and my hand swept through her sending ripples through her misty visage like tears falling into a lonely pond (she laughed a brittle, broken sound and as the knife plunged into my heart I knew she wasn't real and I wondered if I was killing myself) [comments] => 5 [counter] => 152 [topic] => 59 [informant] => Cancer [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 5 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 0 [associated] => [topicname] => psychoticpoems )
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