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Array
(
[sid] => 58075
[catid] => 1
[aid] => mick
[title] => WHy I Need To Quit
[time] => 2004-07-29 14:42:58
[hometext] => written after my father had died, then my brother killed himself on my bday....i started getting a little nutty then...
[bodytext] => I have allowed myself to succumb to temptation Ignoring any rational realization I'm wanting out, I'm wanting no more And I laugh as I walk thru my door I sit here, jack in one hand, 44 pills in the other I sit here, thinking of my dead Father and my brother I can't let go of memories I've had poison in my blood, I've knelt down on my knees And I have yet to feel this God to which I pray But I feel closer to death more and more each day And I wish for it, yes I want it to come Undo this person I've become But I will never have the guts to quit So, I find my only comfort in each hit I'm doing things I swore I'd never do And I know just what kinda life this could turn into But, I just no longer care My faith in love has been lost...somewhere And my desire for life isn't strong I will keep living, but my spirit is gone [comments] => 4 [counter] => 165 [topic] => 61 [informant] => emeraldeyes [notes] => [ihome] => 0 [alanguage] => english [acomm] => 0 [haspoll] => 0 [pollID] => 0 [score] => 4 [ratings] => 1 [editpoem] => 1 [associated] => [topicname] => selfstruggles )
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